Inside the Schottenstein Center* at The Ohio State University, Annie and her Goats take the floor for warmups, but Coach Bull has to inquire as to the whereabouts of his superstar player. I don’t know who this guy “Ralph” is, but someone oughta tell him that use of that Big White Phone is strictly reserved! What Keisha meant to tell Coach is that Summer is “driving the porcelain bus”. Or “laughing at the ground”. Or “throwing it into reverse”. Or…
(* Hat tip to Helskor for location scouting!)
As the Talking Exposition Bus splashes its way towards Colum, Fishstick Annie (still alive! Thank God) tells Bull he “took quite a risk” in adding her to his staff. Staff? There were no assistant coaches; the entire staff consisted of Bull. Was the “risk” that he might catch flak for doubling his “staff” in this famously cash-strapped sports program? The only risk that I see here is that Keisha and Summer might attempt another aerial butt-bump with Ann in the middle and shatter her pelvis.
Wow. In a comic strip legendary for its epic sadness, I don’t think it’s ever been sadder that it is today. Bad enough that Harry’s devotion to Tarzan “comical books” would lead him to consider cashing in his daughter’s college fund. But when Donna, the only woman in the world who finds him desireable, dares to (only-half-) jokingly expresses her longing for him, everyone in the room is immediately and visibly repulsed. I suppose Maddie can be forgiven her reaction to hearing her parents allude to “gettin’ busy”. As for John, he’s probably skeeved at the thought of caressing anything besides pubescent boys.
A while back, someone stated on Twitter that the Komix Korner was based on Ground Zero Comics in Strongsville, Ohio (15 miles from TB’s home in Medina). I couldn’t find GZ Comics’ website, but some pics found on patch.com seem to support this. The store’s nestled in a strip mall, not above a pizza joint, but like the Korner, it’s decorated with nerd tchotchkes. They also have a Space Invaders machine just like Tony’s.
I’m far from Miss Manners here but it’s gotta be in poor form to unload your woe-is-me tale on someone that’s actually losing something, including possibly his finances, house, marriage, kid’s college fund, who knows what else. It’s like telling your neighbor that you’re sorry that huge oak tree fell on his house; it was a nice tree for birds to hang out on and sing.
And with that uninspired observation, I turn the rest of the week’s snarking back to the master, TFHackett! Thanks for the opportunity to try and dredge some chuckles out of this bleak week!
It was like Facebook but in the real world? Has Tom B ever been to Facebook? Unless Crazy’s idea of chatting up the staff or other customers included begging them to join his mafia or showing random strangers pictures of his neice, I doubt it was much like Facebook.
I wonder if the real Village Booksmith sells DVDs or CDs, or just old back issues of Readers’s Digest. Either way, getting accosted by my weird mailman at a bookstore would be enough to drive me away, or go nuclear on his butt.
Crazy Harry: “So what book did ya get?”
Me: “The joys of animal sex! I’ve always heard about it and was kind of curious. Lots of horse stuff in it. I’m more of a marsupial man myself but kangaroos are hard to come by in Ohio…”
Son of Stuck Funky 
