Like a restless wind inside a comic box

Big guest star get in today’s strip. Playing the role of Cory is Deimos, the potato-shaped second moon of Mars. TB clearly has friends high up in the IAU if he’s getting celestial bodies onto the set.

So… what else is happening?
– In a ringing endorsement of the quality of Starbuck Jones, Cory has never been more sure of anything he has ever done ever, than he is about his desire to sell these comic books.
– We also learn that this is NOT a complete collection, as I and others might have inferred, but that the first few issues are reprints from an archive book.
– Cory also drops the fact that Funky once owned Starbuck Jones #1 on the guy who knows that better than anyone. In fact, we were first introduced to Batom Comics and Starbuck Jones because DSH got behind on his rent during a bad month for Montoni’s back in 2010. Funky had to crack open the Montoni’s safe and sell his non-bagged, non-slabbed copy of issue #1 to save his shop AND DSH’s deadbeat hind parts in the process. It was OK, though, because Funky was never in to Starbuck Jones, only buing the comic because an old guy, who was actually his present self but badly injured in a car accident and hallucinating that he was his present self but in the Act I past, told him to do so.

Anyways, did DSH ever pay Funky back for covering for him? Or does he think helping Holly assemble the very collection Cory is now selling squares them?

In any event, today we have what I believe is the first conversation between two characters who Funky has been far too generous with (remember who covered for Cory’s theft at the Lisa walk). May as well have Les walk in for good measure…

Sorry, I didn’t really mean that.

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20 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

20 responses to “Like a restless wind inside a comic box

  1. SpacemanSpiff85

    I really, truly miss the Act II days. As overwrought and melodramatic as the strip was then, you had actual stakes. Alcoholism, war, divorce, cancer. I can’t believe Batiuk really thinks anyone is invested in what’s going to happen to Cory’s comic collection.

  2. In any event, today we have what I believe is the first conversation between two characters who Funky has been far too generous with (remember who covered for Cory’s theft at the Lisa walk).

    In any actual realistic setting, the entire Winkerbean family would have completely cut off and disowned DSH and One-Armed Becky for the way they royally screwed Wally over. Instead, Funky just nods and takes rent from DSH, while Harry Dinkle is the obvious band director at Westview High.

    And that’s because Funky Winkerbean, like Tom Batiuk’s feeble imagination and creative writing process, has long passed its expiration date.

    If only Corey had the hutzpah to team up with Frankie, finally giving us all two protagonists we could actually root for.

  3. Epicus Doomus

    Lest we forget, Komix Korner owes Holly a nice sum of money for the Dick Tracy auction comics. So the idea that Cory is going to sell the SJ collection that Holly put together to that very same comic shop is sort of ironic in a weird Batiukian way. She never should have gotten involved with comics in the first place if you ask me, they’re nothing but trouble.

    And he finally mentioned SJ #1 after completely ignoring it during the SJ collection mega-arc. Also amused by how DSH John is acting like this is the first he’s heard of the SJ collection even though he helped Holly assemble it. Man this comic strip is strange at times.

  4. SpacemanSpiff85

    @Epicus Doomus:
    That’s the weird thing. Does he honestly think that there are two near-complete collections in town, and he’s never heard of this one? Despite the fact that he spent months helping complete this one?

  5. billytheskink

    This recession Cory is talking about, is it economic or does he mean his hairline?

  6. There’s a difference between being really passionate about your interests and boring the shit out of everyone else with them. Batiuk crossed that line so long ago he couldn’t find it with a telescope.

  7. SpacemanSpiff85

    Not sure if somebody else already mentioned this, but I found it pretty hilarious that Batiuk, on his blog, describes how he knew he found his calling through the letter section of The Flash. And how the editor encouraged everyone’s comments about the comic book, and how of course most of the people commenting ended up being fabulously successful writers. I guess commenting on comics is noble when you do it via letter, and deranged when you do it online, apparently.

  8. erdmann

    I believe someone already suggested Cory is actually selling the collection to buy Rocky an engagement ring. I’ll add that Cory will end up thanking Holly for tracking down the books, thus making possible his purchase of a diamond that will choke a goat and his impending marriage. He will promise he will never forget all she has done for him. There will be happy, touchy-feeling huggy times for all the Winkerbeans and projectile vomiting for all of us.

  9. This is turning into a very long and stupid episode of Arthur, On the one hand, we have Corey who’s outgrown Starbuck Jones and simply wants to use the money for some constructive purpose. On the other, we have DSH and his mom weeping about the hard work they put into to build the collection. Given that this is by, of and for young adults in their sixties, Corey will be stuck with the collection because schmaltz and momism rule the world.

  10. ComicTrek

    But wait! Weren’t those comics given away or temporarily sent away a while ago? IIRC, it had something to do with Mason Jarr or something…
    Either way, I’m genuinely curious about what kind of nothing is going to happen this time around. If it involves Cory, there might even be a little bit of something!

  11. Hannibal's Lectern

    I predict Cory will use the money he gets from selling the comics to get Botox injections around his mouth. Not to suppress the Les-like smirk that keeps popping up under inappropriate circumstances, but to make it permanent.

  12. Rusty

    Remember, Cory had to take Summer to a dance after Funky forced him to ask her. I say Funky still owes him for that one.

  13. louder

    I guess it would be asking too much, that if the Rocky scenario happens, she says: “No, I think of you as just a friend,” to keep the No Happy Endings of Cancerville alive.

  14. Hey, I think I know how this will play out. Cory will sell his complete Starbuck Jones collection in order to make enough money to buy another complete Starbuck Jones collection.

  15. Jim in Wisc.

    SpacemanSpiff85 wrote: I can’t believe Batiuk really thinks anyone is invested in what’s going to happen to Cory’s comic collection.

    He he does think that, the guy is much more delusional than we’ve been assuming.

  16. billytheskink

    @ Rusty Remember, Cory had to take Summer to a dance after Funky forced him to ask her. I say Funky still owes him for that one.

    True, but he was forced because Funky blackmailed him for covering for his theft of the Lisa run funds. Pretty sure Funky doesn’t think that squared them.

    Really, Les (who was terrified of housing a mopey daughter) owes Funky for that date, another of the many favors that Funky has done for Les without reciprocation.

  17. In which we learn that Cory, recruited by ISIS and renamed Corstapha el-Winkazzis (apologies to any Mideast scholars here), takes the comics proceeds, buys a truck and a load of fertilizer, and blows up the infidel shop Montonis and brings the jihad home to Westview even as he goes off to collect his virgins in the afterlife. (Which is clearly his prime motivation… he is seriously a dude who never got laid.)

  18. $$$WESTVIEWONCOLOGIST$$$

    “I’ve never been more sure of anything!” “I’m going to buy as many weapons I can and “John Darling” Les Moore!

  19. In which we learn that Cory, recruited by ISIS…—F. Blurt.

    “I’ve never been more sure of anything!” “I’m going to buy as many weapons I can and “John Darling” Les Moore!—$$$WestviewOncologist$$$

    Let’s Lewis & Clark the current narrative a bit. Is Cory Jekyll & Hyding his mom, or is he Romancing the Stoning Rocky? Or does he dream of an Endless Summer? Or are Blurt & the Oncologist right? To paraphrase Bill Clinton, it all depends on what the meaning of ISIS.

  20. HAnzMFG

    Cory, you ungrateful young punk! You’re about to get a serious lesson in valuing the goodness in comic books this week! I haven’t read the strips yet but I put my money on John laying a smug smackdown on Cory, who will deeply regret having his comic book collection sold if he doesn’t get some intervention.