Love is a Battlefield

Today’s strip

I suppose from the viewpoint of a citizen of Westview, life is a savage desert terrain wherein you can be killed at any moment.  That next bite of pizza might go down the wrong way and take you out, or that comic page may give you a paper cut that will develop into gangrene.  Even worse, you may not spot Les Moore before he spots you, and your PUNishment will be severe.

Here we seem to have another episode in which the interesting thing–Cory’s proposal–is passed over and we just see the aftermath.  I really can’t see the military dialogue as being a “proposal” or any kind, but it does sound like an argument in favor.

I guess?…I mean, the military dialogue seems to indicate that there’s trouble afoot, but the two of them together can overcome it.  I’m not sure what kind of trouble they’re in, except of course that they live in Westview.  Most proposals are accompanied by talk of how happy they’ll be, rather than how many problems they’ll face.   One would think that being in combat would tend to make a person more resourceful, but then one suspects “combat” is nothing compared to daily life in Les Mooreland.

And again, we’re not told if Cory is just on leave, or if his stint in the army has concluded.

Speaking of stints concluding, mine as your host has now come to an end.   As two-week periods go, this one was definitely…two weeks.  Tomorrow the fabulously expensive David O takes over.  Over to you, David!

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23 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

23 responses to “Love is a Battlefield

  1. SpacemanSpiff85

    The really bizarre thing is that Rocky’s not one of the soldiers there. I don’t think the one doing all the talking is Cory, either. It sure doesn’t look like him at least. This would make a lot more sense if it was supposed to be some memory of the two of them having each other’s backs in Afghanistan, but as it is it’s just random soldiers talking and then Rocky saying yes.

  2. Epicus Doomus

    While I get what he was aiming for with this, it doesn’t really help me enjoy it more, or even overlook how stupid it is for that matter. If he’d just tell a freaking story without waffling around or being all cryptic about maybe he’d have some actual readers instead of just us.

  3. Chyron HR

    “I’m gonna marry you, Rocky Ledge! And you, Sipkowitz! And Beanie! And Reggie–yeah, even ol’ Reggie; he’s not so stuck up once you get to know him!”

    CORRECTION: It has come to our attention that Rocky Ledge is a supporting character from “Judge Parker”. This blog regrets the error.

  4. Gyre

    Off-panel, the two people in uniforms burst out laughing after getting through that scene. If they found the script so ridiculous and funny then surely the audience will love this military parody.

    And somewhere else Cory is proposing to Rocky.

  5. And yet, still more romantic than Les’ proposal.

  6. Let’s just say I have experience being in the Army. And also, let’s just say that the dialogue in today’s strip makes me CRINGE. Vauge confidence boosting shit over a secure radio? Really? Only soldiers in movies say “roger that.”

  7. The lines from the first panel and the penultimate panel seem to indicate resignation rather than love. Although the dialogue accurately implies that life can deal lemons it seems to me that there should be more attraction and chemistry shown between Cory and Rocky than what’s here.

  8. Rusty

    That skinny girl in the last panel in no way resembles the Rocky that was heaving luggage around in the airport.

  9. What REALLY pisses me off, and this is kind of a no-shit-Sherlock slam on Batiuk, is that when you’re on an Army patrol, NO SHIT it’s not easy, and NO SHIT you don’t nnow what’s coming. And nobody would say this over a radio! Or anytime, really. C’mon, Batiuk. Do better.

  10. SpacemanSpiff85

    @HAnzMFG:
    The only reason they don’t say these kinds of gems is because they’re not the Lord of Language like Batiuk.

  11. DOlz

    @TheDiva, “And yet, still more romantic than Les’ proposal.”

    That should be the all purpose dramatic rejoinder equivalent to the comic all purpose rejoinder “That’s what she said”.

  12. Epicus Doomus

    Long ago I predicted that Cory’s military experience would end up being the polar opposite of Wally’s and so far he’s done nothing to prove me wrong. Wally enlists and suffers through a hellish nightmare that nearly kills him many times over, Cory enlists and becomes a bland model son AND meets the love of his life in the process. Wally comes home, loses Becky to a comic book store guy and ends up as a booze-swilling depressed pizza-slinging loner, Cory comes home to a valuable comic book collection he immediately turns into quick cash and gets engaged over a few glasses of top-shelf vino. Just my demented fan opinion but I believe this Cory crap is BanTom’s way of atoning for how absurdly over-the-top his endless Wally torture was, sort of like how Cayla hasn’t even had so much as a cold since she married Les.

    The Army comes out looking pretty damn good too when you consider the remarkable job they did with Cory. The surly degenrate scuzzbag who used to skulk around all angsty with his necklace and bangs is now a ramrod-straight example of American values, haircuts and grins. See what I mean?

    And let’s be honest here. As long as they remain in Westview, this Rocky Rhodes woman has hit the jackpot with the Corporal. His family controls the local pizza trade AND they have powerful ties within the comic book industry, not to mention the fact that her future step-father-in-law is the head of the local chamber of commerce AND has traveled back in time on at least two occasions. And Holly is usually amiable enough in that dimwitted way of hers, too, plus she loans friends large sums of money on complete whims as well, which might come in handy someday. So when you look at it that way it’s quite a break for this barely-fleshed-out character we’ve grown to be able to identify relatively quickly.

  13. @SpacemanSpiff85:

    @HAnzMFG:
    The only reason they don’t say these kinds of gems is because they’re not the Lord of Language like Batiuk.

    Let it be known henceforth that Mr. Thomas Q. Batiuk of Medina, Ohio, USA, is officially designated as the Oh Lord of Language.

  14. Hope she likes the taste and smell of bad pizza. She’s going to be exposed to a lot of it soon enough. If it weren’t for an all-pizza diet, most of the interchangeable fat, doughy, dim blonde women would be slim and relatively bright.

  15. ComicTrek

    Okay, I’ll admit it. The last panel – at least the art – I actually liked. 🙂 I guess in TB’s head, it’s supposed to show how far our favorite juvenile delinquent has come. BUT this still does not EXPLAIN how the Cory Budd-Winkerbean went from sweet toddler, to angry teen, to snarky prankster teen, to sudden model military boy who’s now, uh….getting married. 😡 And what about those COMICS? Are we just going to forget all about them like they’re dust in the wind?!

  16. Rusty

    @Epicus: As long as Rocky can stay on the good side of Holly, who we now know has a violent temper.

  17. In other news, there are only two weeks left of Apartment 3-G. And today’s Bloom County 2015 is both hilarious and absolutely devastating in its social commentary.

  18. Double Sided Scooby Snack

    I’m surprised Corky didn’t take a page from the Leslie Moore Marriage Proposal Guide. He could have taken her on a tour of all the places he stole from, and the principal’s office, where he had his own private chair. Then he would have summed up the proposal by working in the phrase “in the main.”

    If these two become regular characters together, will we be subjected to an unending assault of military metaphors and army puns as they work elbow to elbow washing dishes at Montoni’s?

  19. Hannibal's Lectern

    In today’s strip, we learn that Cory’s military service consisted of acting in training films.

  20. bad wolf

    I just want to point out that onetime potential lead character Summer Moore, same age as Cory, has never been shown developing a relationship with any significant other. Not even one.

  21. Epicus Doomus

    bad wolf: Summer is one of the very few unattached Westviewians, along with the nearly forgotten Cody, the hapless Pete and the banished Susan Smith. And no, Keisha doesn’t count either. I seem to recall Cory taking Summer out on a “pity date” once, back when he was still a surly dirtbag, but otherwise she’s still a dateless wonder. I guess Lisa never got around to recording a “dating tips” tape for Summer, preoccupied as she was by Les’ post-Lisa sex life and all.

  22. The Dreamer

    Cory is two years or so removed from being a high school delinquent with serious emotional problems and criminal habits, and now he’s out of the army a man, with no PTSD, no job, no education, back living with his parents, and so yes he is getting married. Only in Batiuk’s fairy tale world would anyone, let alone Cory’s parents, recommend he get married at this time. Particualrly when neither he nor his fiancee have in any way adjusted to being back in civilian life. This whole storyline is absurd!