Deuce-bag

Les Moore’s tour of temerity continues in today’s strip. I think we’re seeing why it has been so long since Bull played tennis with Les.

The man is a monster. An individual devoid of any redeeming value. The reason alien invaders will cite for killing every last member of the human race. The image of him smirking, poised to serve, has soured me on the sport of tennis entirely. The revenge fantasies of 90s pop punk bands were kinder to their one-time high school bullies than Les. Donald Trump is appalled by his lack of tact and Bill Laimbeer cannot fathom his level of sportsmanship.

The craziest thing, to me, is that we have known the above to be true for years. We expected this kind of behavior, we know it is coming. It’s terrifying to think about.

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22 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

22 responses to “Deuce-bag

  1. HeyItsDave

    I didn’t do a parody for today’s comic because there really is no way I can make Les look more like a self-centered bullying asshole than he already does, straight from his creator’s pen.

    It’s so obvious that Bull is completely outclassed on the court by Les, and instead of having a friendly session of casually lobbing the ball (which would still be exercise) Les is playing hard and humiliating the poor bastard.

    Yeah, Bull used to bully Les in high school (35 years ago, f’chrissake!! LET IT GO!!) but remember, Bull lived for years carrying those memories as guilt. He apologized to Les, and Les ACCEPTED. And Bull has continually worked to atone for the past. Who helped Les get into condition for his stroll up Mt. Kilimanjaro? Who worked tirelessly with Summer to strengthen her blown knee? Who stepped in and put an end to Wedgeman’s bullying of Alex,going so far as to suspend him (a star player) from the football team?
    Yeah. Way to go, Les. Shit on a guy who has arguably done more for you in the past ten years than anyone else you know. You piece of shit, I wouldn’t piss on your head if your hair was on fire.

  2. MJ

    Congratulations Les, you’re holding serve. Such a rare thing in tennis.

  3. spacemanspiff85

    @HeyItsDave:
    Oh, I’d piss on him if he was on fire, just not anywhere near the fire itself.

  4. billytheskink

    Since Bull is struggling to connect his racket with tennis balls, perhaps he could practice and improve his technique by swatting a larger sphereoid shape. A sphereoid with, oh let’s say, glasses and a goatee. Just a thought.

  5. Gerard Plourde

    What a despicable character. Is Batty finally showing that he hates the entire strip and is going to inaugurate a scorched earth policy even extending to his alter ego?

  6. Epicus Doomus

    This is Dick Facey at his most obnoxious and detestable and Bull at his most unbelievably oafish and stupid. TomLes just can’t ever let high school go, apparently those old grudges never die, they just become opportunities for hilarious revenge.

    Coming next week: Les sneeringly crushes Crazy at the annual air guitar contest, then defeats Cindy in the annual “best and most youthful complexion” competition.

  7. I….just…how do you even write a character like this? How do you imagine someone gloating over trouncing their best friend who was LITERALLY HAVING A COPD ATTACK TEN MINUTES AGO and think this character is in any way amusing and/or sympathetic? How do you look at today’s strip and say, “Yep, job well done!”? It boggles the mind.

  8. DOlz

    You know what fantasy I have about someone that’s done me and many others wrong? Its that FW gets cancelled one month short of 50 years.

  9. spacemanspiff85

    @DOlz:
    What would be funnier is if the strip makes it to fifty years, but Batiuk doesn’t get the Gold T-Square because the Cartoonists Society doesn’t consider the last ten years of this strip to actually count as writing.

  10. spacemanspiff85

    @Epicus Doomus:
    I would say next week Les will mock Cayla for not being as magnificent a writer as he is. And the week after he’ll call Summer a loser for not spending as many years with Lisa as he did.

  11. Here, we have a crowing ape who’ll die friendless because everyone bloody hates him and his pissy, superior attitude. On the other side, Crankshaft is used as a vehicle for an old idiot to complain about banks.

  12. Rusty Shackleford

    At this point, Batty may as well reboot the entire strip to focus on his comics fantasies. It would be better than full world balloons talking about ” Bull’s Story: A heart breaks”. Then there will be hidden tapes found of Bull in drag, pretending to be Les’ mother. “I m mean, but I want someone to love.” ” I bullied Les cause I was trying to help him.”

  13. Good God, boasting about beating someone who is clearly having health issues…that’s just so despicable, I can’t even.

    You just know that if Les was thrashed by another player who wasn’t gasping for breath, Les would whine endlessly about how he was “bullied.”

  14. Chyron HR

    Christ, what a Les Moore.

  15. @epicusdoomus – Les will beat Harry at air guitar after Harry loses an arm. Les will be totally in his face after. “Well, Harry. ..no ‘arm in trying, eh?” Smirk.

  16. Love means nothing to Tom Batiuk.

  17. Hitorque

    Well done on the Laimbeer reference… MOTOR CITY BAD BOYS FOR LIFE!!!

  18. Hitorque

    When someone is THIS unapologetically evil and sociopathic, and doesn’t instantly get killed by a bolt if lightning, I know that there is no God…

  19. @HeyItsDave:”…there really is no way I can make Les look more like a self-centered bullying asshole than he already does, straight from his creator’s pen.”

    I dunno… seems to me BatHack has already given us the “special” vocabulary, and the stereotypical poses, to depict Les as the thorough douche he is:

    (OK, it’s a cheap gag, and relies of a half-assed pun involving a made-up word… which makes it pretty much standard “FW” material.)

  20. Professor Fate

    I guess this is what Les does when school is out and he can’t lord his superior knowledge over students that he refuses to teach instead using them to inflate his own ego about how smart he is. It’s all of a piece; for example when presented with a chance to actually make a living as a writer in Hollywood, he whined because he wasn’t in charge and then destroyed the project. A real challenge and a real chance of failure is not for our Les oh no – he’s a bully and petite bourgeoisie pseudo Intellectual insecure fake who must have others that he can lord his superiority over. It’s why he gloried in his wife’s dying ‘look at how good I am what suffering I am enduring far more than any of you’ and why his new wife is a doormat. He’s a soulless monster and that he’s the author’s Mary Sue says nothing good about the Author. If there was justice and there is not the strip would end with Les murdered in his sleep by the people that know him Murder on the Orient Express style.

  21. Jim in Wisc.

    What’s really terrifying is that Less More is allegedly L’ Auteur Glorieux’s avatar. Is this what Mr. Batiuk is like in real life?

  22. bad wolf

    The mind boggles. Well at least i was mildly amused by a related tweet i saw recently: