Long Boremen

Plot Contrivance, thine name be Batuik! In Today’s Strip, Tombat keeps piling up the goofiness to higher levels of unreliability. Gee, sorry you can’t get your PENS Darrin but the dock workers are striking to cut the amount of limbs crushed by shipping containers down to no more than ten a month.

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18 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

18 responses to “Long Boremen

  1. Epicus Doomus

    The art store! Of course! Poor, poor Boy Lisa. All the forces of nature are conspiring against him as he desperately attempts to do some work for the first time in several months. Will his indignities never end? Will this arc?

  2. SpacemanSpiff85

    Seriously, what the hell is supposed to be funny or interesting this week? This has got to be Batiuk just writing down what happened to him and his precious pens right before he sat down to write this strip.

  3. I don’t care if those pens are made of solid gold and have inks only obtainable in the Harvard Pigment Library, the can NOT be worth this much trouble.

  4. spacemanspiff85

    This story is making Pete’s “Lord of the Late” procrastination crap look totally normal and reasonable.

  5. Great. Super. Durwood is going to violate a picket line because he’s a self-indulgent douchetard who’s so dense, light bends around him. Right now, he’s making Crankshaft look good….especially since Ed is currently mutating into Funky Winkerbean moaning about the oblivion that awaits us all after Death.

  6. How can we get the longshoremen back to work, Pete?

    I know! Let’s put on a show!

  7. Gerard Plourde

    Batty can’t maintain continuity over three days. On Wednesday Darrin called “every store in the city” and was told they didn’t have any. On Thursday he’s shown searching a Japanese web site for the pen, presumably because they’re no longer being imported. Today, the art store (not the art supply store?) tells him they’re on a ship that hasn’t arrived yet, but which won’t be off-loaded because of a longshoremen’s strike. Wouldn’t the stores he called initially have had and passed on this information?

  8. Rusty Shackleford

    Batty’s outta here for the summer. He is wasting more time with another go nowhere stall strip and over in Crankyland he is back to the annual carnival jokes.

    It’s going to be a long hot summer.

  9. If the Art Store can get the pens via container ship from a supplier in Japan, then they can get them via overnight air express from that same supplier.

    Meanwhile, notice how we’re not actually seeing anything happening, just a series of generic panels in which two mopes talk to each other about what’s happening somewhere else. The pictures really serve no purpose other than to support the dialog balloons. Tom Batiuk has invented a new form of entertainiment: the Radio Play!

  10. billytheskink

    Durwood, please. If the dockworker’s strike ended then you’d be all “the pens are in a shipping container in Long Beach… ewwww.” Once they got delivered to the “Art Store” then you’d say “The Art Store’s in Santa Monica, and we might get stuck in traffic on the 405.”

    Pete would continue to go along with all of this because he wants to work even less than Durwood does. I mean, he’s dropped everything this week just to stand over Dirwood’s shoulder and listen to him whine.

  11. Jim in Wisc.

    @Hannibal’s Lectern: I’ve ordered stuff from several European countries, as well as Australia, and even when I chose the el cheapo shipping, it’s always sent via air mail.

    BTW, I checked with “Grandpa Google” and container ships take roughly 10 – 15 days to cross the Pacific. So, Durwood’s been sitting around with his thumb up his ass for somewhere around two weeks waiting for his precious pens. And the only thing he’s apparently done that whole time is draw his paychecks. Dagwood Bumstead should take lessons from this guy.

  12. Another story arc ripped from last year’s headlines:

    Simmering Labor Fight Brings Crippling Delays to West Coast Seaports, nytimes.com, Feb. 15, 2015.

  13. Professor Fate

    What? What? WHAT? A dockworkers strike? What the hell next – “sorry Durwood the container ship was stuck by a comet and went down with all hands. ”
    “But what about the Pens! My Pens!”
    Wackiness ensues as Pete and Durwood hire a salvage vessel and end up searching through the wreck in old fashioned diving suits and helmets. And just as they find the pens, A Shark takes off Durwood’s drawing hand.

  14. Bobby Joe

    I would like to have a job like this. Sit around and bitch all day and do nothing productive. Where is their boss? You would think he might stop by ask ask what the hell they are doing. Does Durwood’s pen crisis prevent Mopey Pete from doing his job, whare very the hell that is.

    In what reality is this stupid situation tolerated? Fire Durwood and send him back to the pizza joint. He has obviously et the Peter Principal.

  15. This arc makes “phoning it in” look like strenuous activity.

    So, one afternoon Tom Batiuk couldn’t find his pen, until five minutes later when he looked under the desk. And I’m guessing he thought to himself, “Well, there’s at least a week’s worth of strips right there!”

    God forbid a lightbulb should burn out, that’ll probably give us a six months epic quest.

  16. $$$WESTVIEW ONCOLOGIST$$$

    Yeah, I’m pretty sure there’s plenty of PENIS you’ll like on that container ship, Durwood.

  17. hitorque

    @billytheskink: Exactly… If it wasn’t this it would be something else… Like I said, this is the type of bullshit you do in grade school when you’d rather do anything but your assignment…

    Darrin has OFFICIALLY put in more effort trying to track down a pen than he has on his actual job…

  18. hitorque

    @Bobby Joe: Yeah, I also wonder why Darrin+Pete have no administrative oversight and no daily job duties whatsoever while drawing a fat-assed paycheck… I mean, this isn’t New Jersey state government…

    I’ve long been looking for a new career from the dead-end shit I’m doing now… If Hollywood is anything like this, I’m taking the first thing smokin’

    The irony of it is 1961 Pete+Darrin can’t even go 30 seconds without their boss barging in and barking out orders…