Jerome???

Link to today’s stupid installment

Jerome? Wow, you really DO learn something new every day. I’m really enjoying how this Jerome “Bull” Bushka career retrospective flies right in the face of Linda’s sudden concerns re: her husband’s wacky antics. She knew all about his endless litany of football injury-related woes for all these years and only now sees a correlation? Is she really the diabolical monster I always assumed she was or is she just that stupid?

And while I’m bandying these questions about, how about this one: is BanTom the single worst storyteller who ever lived or is there another mad genius out there who’s built an entire career from repeating a simple premise over and over again to the point where that’s all it is? I doubt it’s ever even occurred to anyone else to “write” stories like this, much less actually do it.

“Mary had a little lamb, Mary owned a small sheep, Mary’s lamb was little, lambs are sheep”…”It was the best of times, times were good, it was the worst of times, bad times, good, bad, bad good, time”…see what I mean? It shouldn’t surprise me anymore, but nevertheless, sometimes I an just incredulous that FW even exists at all. It can’t, it shouldn’t, yet here it is, each and every day.

 

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20 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

20 responses to “Jerome???

  1. There are only two ways this can go–Bull can be incapacitated, like Fred Fairgood, or shrug off his condition, like Dinkle.

    There’s no third option, because a) there’s already Funky to complain endlessly about his physical condition, and b) Batiuk cannot risk having Lisa diminished in any way.

    Fred, the incapacitated one, rarely appears. He’s pretty much gone from the strip. Dinkle, on the other hand, shows up far too often. That’s because he’s the only one who can deliver the godawful music puns.

    So I’m thinking Bull will be like Dinkle–basically back to his old self, there to offer sports puns and “sage” council to his replacement at Westview…either Fred’s wife or Summer.

    Probably Summer, because then she and Les can commiserate over their encounters with Bull.

  2. Epicus Doomus

    BC: I’m leaning toward this being a zany “misunderstanding” followed by Les advising his “old pal” to go get “checked out” because “it couldn’t hurt”. Then it’ll never, ever be mentioned again. it’s boring plus it gives Les the chance to be the “hero” too. Batiuk always likes to believe that merely mentioning an “issue” counts as “tackling” it, he’s been doing that for years now.

  3. 1966tvbatman

    The first names of the four worst comic strip storytellers: Greg, Brooke, Woody, and Tom

  4. spacemanspiff85

    I’m almost positive that someone who had a lackluster college career marred by a serious injury wouldn’t get a personal invitation for an NFL tryout. Especially one who continually charges into everything headfirst.

  5. ComicTrek

    So you decide to become a football coach and lead other boys in mauling each other. Could this be the strip’s worst, least logical retcon ever?

  6. spacemanspiff85

    @ComicTrek:
    That’s one of the many idiotic things about this storyline. Apparently Bull’s entire football career was one agony after another, and he knew it was ruining him. And yet he became a football coach.

  7. billytheskink

    Assuming the retconned Act I high school graduation date of 1978 and that Bull Curly Jerome didn’t have a redshirt year at EMU, his cup of coffee in the NFL would have come right before the 1982 players strike that wiped out half the regular season.

    So TB actually missed a chance to have Bull’s football career bring him even more misery here. I am in genuine disbelief.

  8. @spacemanspiff85 – about Bull’s invitation to the NFL–remember, Summer also had a terrible knee injury, but apparently that didn’t stop Kent State from offering her a full sports scholarship. Most here thought that highly unlikely, but…

    It’s apparent that Tom Batiuk just wants things to “happen” (if that’s the right word for such an actionless strip) and doesn’t really care how the real world works.

  9. Well, of course he doesn’t care how the real world works. This is why he turns into a real-life Dick Facey and says it’s all writing. Bull will walk off his CTE so that Les can be the only tragic figure and Keesterman will be told that he enjoys being Crankshaft’s victim because he took too long to report it. .

  10. Rusty

    This week’s strips present literally as the notes TB took while watching a documentary on ESPN.

  11. 1. LOL… If there was ever a “Westview Scapegoats” of the NFL, it’s the St. Louis Football Cardinals…

    2. How dare those marginal players who are desperate to make an NFL roster hit Bull, and hit him hard! Seriously, how many hard hits could he have really taken in the two weeks before he was cut?

    3. Did I miss something? Bull knew he didn’t really have anything left, but he went to training camp anyway? Was there a gun to his head or something?

    4. As someone else mentioned yesterday, WHO is this weirdo woman, and HOW does she have such intimate, detailed, retconned knowledge of Bull’s football career which ended damn near 40 years ago? What is she, curator of the Bull Bushka museum or something?

  12. In case anyone was wondering, the ZIP code on the letter is for Clinton Township, Michigan….

  13. There’s also the possibility that Bull will spend eternity driving his truck around aimlessly in a rage, until the next time TB wants to do a sporto joke, at which point Bull will be back on the job as if nothing ever happened.

  14. $$$WESTVIEW ONCOLOGIST$$$

    1. Football is dangerous. It has ALWAYS been dangerous. If you are person that decides to play the game expect to be hit hard often and frequently. Expect to be injured.

    2. While I do sympathize and agree with NFL needing to do more, A lot of this has to do with bad tackling technique. I remember hearing Mike Ditka say that players today don’t know how to tackle properly which is what leads to injuries.

    3. I also find it hilarious that most of this damage is done by the frigging tackling dummy! Which your supposed to hit with your shoulder and arms and not your fucking head!!!

  15. $$$WESTVIEW ONCOLOGIST$$$

    Crankshaft:

    Wonderful, Keesterman. You just hired the “Les Moore” of lawyers.

  16. spacemanspiff85

    @Rusty:
    I think that’s giving him too much credit. I figure it’s what he heard on a news update on his car radio. Maybe even an NPR piece, but I doubt it.

  17. @$$$WESTVIEW ONCOLOGIST$$$:

    Nevermind the fact that Bull as a fullback would have been considerably bigger and stronger than most defenders trying to tackle him…

    Fun fact: Bull still played in the era of so-called “normal sized” football players… the average size of pro players didn’t start to balloon up until the late 80s/early 90s…

  18. batgirl

    I would forgive much (so, so, much) if all these tragic insights into Bull’s health culminated in Les realizing that he’d been a complete arse to Bull on the tennis court.

  19. Jason

    Given Batuik lives in northern Ohio, I’m surprised he didn’t blame Bull’s ruination at least in part on the Pittsburgh Steelers.

  20. Don

    I’m surprised there wasn’t any snark about how “original” Tom was in choosing “College Avenue” in “University Town.” Then again, Texas A&M is in College Station, Maryland is in College Park, and Penn State is in University Park…and California has both a College Avenue and a University Avenue.