Boresday, February 1

Today’s strip was, again, not available for preview.

So, let’s look back at the 1983 introduction of the goat that so disturbed Buck back in the day, Billy the Scapegoat. Or was his name actually Billy? The answer may surprise you… but probably won’t interest you.

First, the whole thing was Dinkle’s idea, including the name “Billy”.  Unfortunately for the Westview football team, the goat did not possess divine power.

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“Billy” was under the impression that Westview had the only terrible high school football team in existence.  Though this might explain why he ran onto the field hitting players.

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He also didn’t care for the uninspired name Dinkle gave him, preferring his own uninspired name.  No ever called him Paul, of course, because he couldn’t talk.

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While called a “scapegoat”, Billy-Paul was more like an oracle, his heavy-lidded ennui a prophesy of things to come for this strip.

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22 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

22 responses to “Boresday, February 1

  1. erdmann

    “His name is Susan and he wants you to respect his life choices.”

    I’m assuming after all these years Paul is dead. The question is, did they cremate his remains the way Stropp’s were, or did the team mark his passage with a tailgate party featuring spicy Argentinian barbecue?

  2. countoftowergrove

    BWAWHAWHAWHAW! It’s funny because Bull has become the Norma Desmond of high school football!

  3. Epicus Doomus

    “It goes fast”…uh, yeah, thanks for revisiting THAT recurring FW theme. The way Bull keeps wallowing in these old high school football memories is making it REALLY difficult to like or sympathize with him. Or even care in the most trivial insignificant way.

    • comicbookharriet

      “Not really Bucky, It doesn’t always go fast. High School Seemed like forever and ever, conversations would take weeks and weeks could take years. But one day I rolled out of bed, and I was ten years older and my children had disappeared.”

    • Charles

      It’s amazing how much of this strip has become “Remember when”. Here we have Bull and his new friend who was only introduced so all of Bull’s arcs can now be focused on him remembering his high school playing days.

      Virtually every Dinkle arc reminds us about how great he was because of his commitment to the marching band back before he retired 2 decades earlier.

      Les nowadays seems to do nothing more than wallow in his loss of Lisa and collect accolades because of his ability in rehashing his loss.

      Even Funky with his “things are terrible today” arcs implicitly call back to better days when things weren’t terrible. Plus he also has plenty of arcs where he’s recounting some random incident from years past. Tony Montoni usually plays the part to trigger it.

      It’s so powerful a pull that Batiuk does it even when it doesn’t make sense. Darin and Pete regularly have weeks where they do nothing but call back to Batom Comics back in the day, which they did not experience themselves.

      So I guess to continue the conversation from last week, where we wonder where the next generation has gone off to, I guess we’ll see more of Summer and Keisha when Batiuk feels that enough time has passed that he can have them show up and reminisce about the time they won the State Basketball Championship.

  4. billytheskink

    Buck’s smirk-worthy double entendre (get it? both the perception of time and Bull’s memory are “going” fast… ugh) stands starkly opposite of anything that could be said about this story arc.

    How many of these high school games does Bull have on video? Westview football had one heck of a video archivist, apparently, given that the team both never won and has now been retconned into existing in the mid-to-late 1970s.

    • Epicus Doomus

      Ugh, I didn’t get it at first, that makes it all much, much worse. Why is BatNom even doing this? What kind of sick glee is he deriving from this arc? He did an entire lengthy arc where Bull was diagnosed and retired from football, now all he does is sit around reminiscing about football. Why did he bring him back at all? Why tack on this annoying depressing coda?

    • Rusty Shackleford

      Good observation. I didn’t pick up on that. In my haste to snark, I missed out on the richness that is FW.

  5. Spacemanspiff85

    Batiuk’s work on these strips sure goes fast. I’m pretty sure he spends five minutes on them in the morning and then goes back to reading Flash comics.

  6. It’s easy for things to seem like yesterday when they’re the only thing you think about. Batiuk might not realize it but he has accidentally made a good point.

    • comicbookharriet

      Wow. I love that statement so much, I wanna print it out and hang it on my wall. No sarcasm. That’s pithy and great!

  7. sgtsaunders

    Today’s installment has got to be the least, most zero, nada, no results, zip-point-shit undertaking in the history of the Winkerverse.

  8. “I like you, Joey. You make me feel tall.”

  9. Based on the masthead, I guess we’re getting Dinkle. I’m sure he’s going to be showered with praise. Ugh.

  10. hitorque

    1. I don’t get that “hardening of the arteries” joke after running laps??

    2. I thought Bull was trying to catch up with his 20-season backlog of ‘Law and Order’ episodes? What happened?

    3. I mean, even if every high school game Bull played in was recorded (extra credit to the technology prophet who had the foresight in 1976 to record all those games in vivid color on VHS format), at the most we’re talking what, 40-44 games at the max? Does he plan to sit in a dank basement isolated and watching his high school glories on repeat until the wife finds him dead? Is Bull going to start burying these tapes all around Westview and leave coded hints for future football coaches to find them?

    4. It guess it’s pretty evident now that Hank Hill is a ghost or figment of Bull’s imagination? Because no real-life person would ever willingly subject themselves to six hours of this bullshit every day (Yes, I know he had a conversation with Bull’s wife but we also know Batiuk has changed the “rules” of ghosts whenever it suited him)

    5. Or maybe Bull is already dead and this is his afterlife?

    • Maxine of Arc

      Billy-Paul is never going to get to run the laps because the team never wins; therefore he will die of heart failure because he never gets any exercise. Actually I thought that series of strips posted above was kind of amusing.

    • bobanero

      What’s more odd is that according to FW lore, the Scapegoats never won a game during Coach Stropp’s tenure, so the idea of watching video of all your egregious losses is beyond depressing.

  11. timbuys

    Nostalgia and dementia, two great flavors that go together not at all awkwardly. Is it just me or do these two look like they’re about to begin the world’s most distasteful and sullen makeout session?

  12. bayoustu

    Bull’s attitude in Panel 2 perfectly represents the way I feel when I read this cockamamie strip!! Except I’m drawn much better.