Adeptable You

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Yes, Harry. We all vividly recall how you invented the concept of “crowdfunding” with your m**herf*cking door-to-door band f*cking candy fund raising drives. Geez, what a windbag. So apparently using a mouse and a keyboard at the same time is no biggie for ol’ Becks, as she’s gotten the Scapegoats Marching Band in on this whole “social media” fad all the kids are into with the phones and such. Honestly (and I’m just speaking for myself here) if I lived in Westview I’d definitely prefer to order my band candy online than to have Owen or Bernie at my door, that’s for damn sure. I mean life in that town is hard enough given the limited dining and reading options and how it snows non-stop for months at a stretch.

Perhaps Principal Nate and the WHS admin staff might want to consider the possibility that Becky’s shitty job performance could be attributed to Dinkle distracting her with his constant inexplicable presence. Just a thought.

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22 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

22 responses to “Adeptable You

  1. spacemanspiff85

    If I could make a list of things that could never be mentioned again in this strip, “band candy” would be near the top. Heck, just “band” entirely, if I’m being honest. I’m not sure if strips where the entire joke is “this high school band director is a hardass” were ever all that funny, but if they were they stopped being funny a couple decades ago.

  2. billytheskink

    If Lefty put some of this adeptly-raised money toward changing a few locks, she could fill her office with more loose leaf 24 lb. laser printer paper and less Dinkle.

    • comicbookharriet

      I mean, in the digital age paper is a dead technology, but then again, so is Dinkle. Might as well have the deadweight be silent.

  3. The Nelson Puppet

    “Miss Becky, I’ve got to hand it to y’all. Y’all certainly have armed y’all’s self with a po-tent social media campaign! Uh…sorry, Miss Becky!
    -the unfortunately named Major General William Wing Loring, CSA

  4. Gerard Plourde

    Yet another arc illustrated by Ayers. The suspicion that Burchett has quit is approaching the level of certainty.

    • The Nelson Puppet

      I’ll bet there was some tension between Burchett and Batiuk about the Eisner Award business. I’m sure Batiuk resents the fact that Burchett is a 2-time Eisner Award winner, while the only attention FW ever gets is from the SOSF Legion.

    • Double Sided Scooby Snack

      I think BatHack and BurchHack broke off their romance after quarreling about:

      1) Implied bricks versus bricks drawn in loving detail.

      2) Batty insisting Burchie make all the same dumb mistakes he did.

      3) Who had to be the “power bottom.”

  5. Charles

    “I love bringing up something that you’ve done that allows me to turn the conversation back onto me!”

    Dinkle would be one hell of a tedious person to talk to.

    • Rusty Shackleford

      I wonder if this is how Batty is in his daily life? We always associate him with Les, but maybe he is more like Dinkle these days.

  6. Paul Jones

    The only way this mess is bearable is if you assume that she’s hallucinating him. Talking to a ghost is one kind of pathetic but talking to this old bore is a worse kind of pathetic.

  7. Dinkle is starting to make me miss horny Mort.

    • billytheskink

      Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

      TB will hear you and we’ll get another Bedside Manor band arc featuring both of them…

  8. It occurs to me that in all the band-related stories, whether here or at Bedside Manor, all the musicians are shown to be incompetent and exasperating. Becky and Dinkle are shown as frustrated to the point of screaming abuse. Doesn’t seem like Batiuk enjoyed his high school band career.

  9. Double Sided Scooby Snack

    “Crowdfunding in slow motion.” Need to add this to the Batiuktionary of words and terms that make just no sense at all.

    “Crowdfunding” is one of those words that makes BatDrip feel oh so hip and “with it.” Also hip terms like blog and on-line. (Whoa! Easy on the Geek Speak!) Batty feels like one swingin’ dood when he talks like that. If you recall, 20 year old Cindy’s salary with Buddyblog (oy) is based on crowdfunding.

    I doubt Batty even knows what it is.

    Anyway, once again, BatNesia forgets what he has already written. Only a few months ago, not only were Bernie Silverberg and Nameless Black Kid selling mattresses door to door, they were CARRYING a mattress around with them, like it was the only one they had for sale. There could not POSSIBLY be less use of social media in that fundraising effort.

    And here’s Batty acting like using social media at all for anything is something new. How OLD is this guy???

  10. Double Sided Scooby Snack

    Going back to the 1970s, I enjoyed the amusing, cartoonish Dinkle with his military uniform and the hat pulled over his eyes. He was an appropriately absurd 2-dimensional character played for some good laughs.

    Fast-forward to now. Three dimensional character. We get to see his “kindly” old elderly face. We see him puttering around the house, in those rare moments he’s not lurking around the school. We know a lot more about him than we need to, including his use of, ahem, “purple” pills. Oh, and like every other character in Batty’s pointy little bald head, he’s a famous WRITER.

    But the problem with Batty inserting the old 1970’s cartoonish persona into this more realistic character is it comes off extremely creepy and weird. And his relationship with Lefty seems particulatly disturbing. Batty aims for “wise and trusted mentor,” but hits “meddlesome, intrusive, lingering creep.” The message, and it’s deafeningly loud, is that BECK does not have what it takes to do this job herself. Does Batty actually believe retired workers return to the place of business to hover over their successors?? He appears to have no clue how bizarre this is.

  11. bayoustu

    To whoever drew the short straw and is now “illustrating” this “comic” strip: stellar job on that hideous close-up of Dinkle and that horrifying, twisted, misshapen, gnarled thing I assume is supposed to be a nose.

  12. The Nelson Puppet

    I can’t blame the artist. What if YOU had Batiuk constantly showing you pictures of George Kennedy’s prosthetic Crankshaft nose?