I Dreamed a Dream

Has working in a comics shop always been your dream?
…asked nobody, anywhere, ever. Except, of course, in the Funkiverse, where who wouldn’t want to work in a comics shop? Screw the postal service, with their generous salary and benefits! If I can’t be Tarzan, why, this job suits me just fine!

Jason
December 18, 2012 at 8:09 pm
…is Harry trying to sell a comic book to Sarah Palin?

I think with the mousy brown hair with the unruly lock in the front, she looks more than a little like Susan…speaking of missing characters whom we wouldn’t mind seeing again.

Contest update!
I wish I could be like Oprah and say “You get a mug! And you get a mug! And…” but failing that, I’m happy to announce that our own Merry Pookster wins the coveted mug from the official Funky Winkerbean CafePress store! Thanks to everyone who commented!

Post No. 1,000

bad wolf
December 17, 2012 at 8:32 am
…Btw, comic book fans are notoriously hard to shop for, as they’ve usually gotten whatever they wanted for themselves already, it’s so specific that you’d never guess what it is, and kids in general [are] not that interested anymore…

From Wikipedia: “A sommelier, or wine steward, is a trained and knowledgeable wine professional, normally working in fine restaurants, who specializes in all aspects of wine service as well as wine and food pairing. The role is more specialized and informed than that of a wine waiter.” I suppose this makes John a “comic book maître d’“. Dead Skunk Head’s hiring strategy seems to be paying off, as the Komix Korner is drawing adult female customers for the first time since Roberta Blackburn paid her fateful visit in 2005.

So yeah, this is the one-thousandth daily post here at SoSF. Not historic, as milestones go, but it would have no significance at all if not for the great folks who read and comment here! To show my appreciation, I’d like to award one lucky snarker a coffee mug from the Official Funky Winkerbean CafePress store! Enjoy your morning beverage from this handsome mug, emblazoned with the image of Act II Funky, showing some ‘tude as he leans against his ill-fated PT Cruiser. No more having to drink your coffee straight from the pot!

Since I’m not crafty enough to devise a real contest, the winner will be chosen totally at random from commenters on today’s post (please limit your comments just for today to two). Happy snarking, and as always, thanks for reading and stay Funky!

Rules and disclaimers: This contest is in no way affiliated with Batom Inc., King Features Syndicate, or CafePress Inc. Winner will be chosen at random from comments submitted on this blog post from midnight to midnight Eastern time, Tuesday, December 18, 2012. As this is a contest drawing, please limit your comments on today’s post to 2 (two); anyone with more than 2 comments on today’s post will be disqualified (sorry!). Winners of past giveaways are ineligible; if a previous winner is randomly chosen, then another random winner will be chosen. Winner selected at random using the WordPress plugin “And the Winner Is…” Prize valued at $13.99 US; item cost and regular shipping will be paid by Son of Stuck Funky. Winner may substitute a different mug or any other item from the Official Funky Winkerbean CafePress store of equal or lesser value. Never drink hot coffee directly from a coffeepot.

Would You Buy a Used Comic Book from This Man?

So I guess today we are back in the “present” after yesterday’s regression to Harry’s mailman days. Or…is Harry working both jobs now? It looks like he’s wearing his postman vest in panel 3. In other sartorial news, Becky’s empty, pinned-up sleeve provides visual focus, as always, as she and John decorate a black Christmas tree. And whoever would equate Harry’s taking a crummy job at the Komix Korner with greed? Clearly this is another one of those punchlines, scrawled on a napkin from Luigi’s of Akron, that Batiuk’s been just itching to use.

Dear Tom Batiuk:

Over the course of 2½ years of presiding over this forum, sharing nearly a thousand daily posts and over 19,000 reader comments about your work, I’ve managed to hang on to a tiny shred of admiration for you. When the “Fuck you, TB” comments flew, I could confidently poke my head out of the foxhole and say, “Hey! Give the man credit. He’s made a forty-year career of doing something he loves.” Or, “He’s seems like he’s actually a nice guy in person.” Or, “Well, he has some interesting musical tastes.” Or, “He’s raised a fair amount of money and awareness to fight cancer.” Or, “O.K., today’s strip is truly funny.” All right, that last one, not so much.

And then, today, Tom, you pull this. You spend three weeks on an arc where Crazy Harry gets fired (or retires, according to one strip), with one week’s notice, and no severance, pension or unemployment benefit, and has to sell off his books and comics before accepting a part-time temp job (which he’d willingly do for no pay) at the Komix Korner. Come Sunday, he-e-e-e-e-re’s Harry, in full postie drag, to deliver the annual “Buon Natale dalla soleggiata Florida!” postcard from Tony (along with a bonus potshot at e-mail).

Admit it, Tom: your heart’s just not in it any longer. This is more egregious than having Les show up in Westview a week after getting on a plane to Tanzania. You fancy yourself a writer; you regularly lecture and chastise the readers; you dismiss as “beady-eyed” anyone who finds fault with your creative output. Even in a fictional milieu where continuity long ago became an afterthought, today’s strip signals to the readers that you flat-out don’t give a shit anymore.

Kevin, Wee Hardly Knew Ye

Nobody has the words to make sense of what happened in Connecticut Friday, except to say God bless those left behind, and open up Your arms to receive those innocents. Hug your kids, your parents, or anyone who needs it. Spare a thought for those whose lives are never going to be the same. Here’s my stupid fucking little blog post.

“Since Kevin left“? Batiuk has done it again: the least interesting characters get weeks-long story arcs about nothing, while the more intriguing, lesser-explored characters are either written out or inexplicably vanish. Anyway, John, even when Kevin was working there, you were “short handed”! (Oops, better refrain from midget little people jokes, lest I be summoned to issue a lengthy, rambling apology on the House floor!)

Helskor
December 14, 2012 at 8:45 am
Harry’s grateful puppydog reaction to being offered a job fit only for a not-too-bright high school kid would be the unintentionally funniest thing Batiuk’s written in years if it wasn’t so pathetic and scary.

Batiuk has spent the last three weeks trying to make us feel sorry for Crazy Harry…I must say, today he finally accomplishes that, by depicting not just Harry’s eagerness to accept John’s “job” offer, but his willingness to “work” for free.