Tag Archives: glaring lack of ambition

Where Dreams Go to Be Smashed to Flinders

Link to today’s strip.

One thing I neglected to mention about yesterday’s episode…and I have to confess, I didn’t mention it because it seemed so ordinary that comment never occurred to me.  But later I realized that it was ordinary in the real world, and not in Funky Winkerbean.   In Funky Winkerbean, it was the proverbial sore thumb, and it shoulda stuck out like one.

Of course, I’m talking about the fact that Becky got a smart-phone app, and she was happy with it.  She was pleased with what she got, and looked forward to using it.

It was not, repeat not, something substandard that had foisted upon her by an uncaring school administration.  She didn’t even moan once!

By way of contrast, look upon the Dozing Dullards out in Hollywood, who upon hearing that the movie they are working might be certain of box-office success, can do nothing but bemoan the extra work that will befall them.  Oh, the horrors of success!  Oh My GOD I have to work even more?

Well, Pete–and you too, Darrin–there’s a very simple solution that will cause all your problems to disappear, and you can leap about in unending joy.

Quit.  Go on up to Clay Breakdance (or whatever his name is) and tell him you’re tired of all the effort that is expected of you, and that you (so far) seem to have failed to provide.  You’re both tired of working, and it’s really cutting into your nap time, and your nostalgic day-dreaming about Bantom comics.  I’m sure his lips will curl just a bit as he accepts your resignations.    Clay will be happy to bring in a crew who actually want to work, and don’t look upon every suggestion as a knife in the back.

And there’s a bonus for both of you!  When the movie is released some months hence, and proves to be a box-office smash, you can bemoan the fact that you were cheated out of all that money.  And that, no doubt, will trigger even more flashbacks.

Win-win, I say.  Now, now, I know those are dirty words in the Funkyverse, but as they say–faint heart never won bitter regrets.

(It kind of makes me wonder what sort of movie Pete and Darin would make if they had complete control–what sort of cinematic turd would satisfy their notion of purity.  I should note that it doesn’t make me wonder enough to actually see that movie, or hear them talk about it.)

PS:  No idea who the very detailed gentleman is, but he sure seems to be someone from Real Life.  Perhaps someone who lost a bet–that’s my guess, anyway.


Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

The Undocumentarian

Link To Today’s Strip

Stay tuned for the incredible snark stylings of Beckoning Chasm, starting tomorrow!!!

An extremely rare Sunday strip arc wrap-up today, as Jessica decides that after almost three years in the planning stages and one day in production she will not allow “Hollywood” to wrap its disgusting filthy immoral paws around her pet project, instead opting to forget all about it and settle for occasionally filming various ceremonies and parties for the local townies instead. Aim high, strong female character, aim high!

See, I thought the original question was “what was JD really like?” but actually it was “did my father ever play Barbie with me?” instead. And now that she knows the answer and has seen actual video proof, her ambition and passion for the project have vanished completely. I see. And by that I mean “I see why they live above Montoni’s”. Aim low, baby Skyler, aim low!

And a typically keen observation from Boy Lisa, who seems oddly content with his wife’s fickle nature. Perhaps someday he’ll run into the doctor who screwed up Lisa’s medical chart that time so HE can get some closure too! That’d be swell.

It’s been a great two weeks here at SoSF HQ but now it’s time to pass the batom (get it?) to our next guest snarker and time for me to hit the bourbon and airplane glue in an attempt to purge the last four weeks from my memory. Until next time, stay Barbie…err, I mean Funky!




Filed under Son of Stuck Funky