Remind Me of My Failures, Bull, For Eternity

Link to today’s strip.

It’s hard to tell because of Tom Batiuk’s typically tin-earred dialogue, but it sounds to me as if Coach Stropp told Bull, “Look, if you can’t get into the end zone while I’m coaching you, can you at least carry my ashes across the goal line, so I can have some sense of what if feels like?  By the way, ‘ashes’ implies that I am dead and cremated, so it’s nothing you have to do today.”

I think the real focus of Mr. Batiuk’s energy is in panel two.  Bull pushes the switch, there’s a satisfying “THUNK” sound, and Linda looks pleased that Bull was able to accomplish something on his own.  The reader can see exactly what happened without it being spelled out.  The transition between panel one’s silhouette and panel two’s illumination is handled well, with the characters in the same position from the same angle.  This tells me that when he cares, Tom Batiuk can draw something that works.  Too bad he doesn’t care more often.

The Last Detail

Link to today’s strip.

I don’t know what Tom Batiuk is reaching for here, but it is clear it exceeds his grasp.

Supposedly, Bull is suffering from memory loss, yet he seems to recall clearly what Coach Stropp’s last instructions to him were.  I guess it’s a good thing Bull never got fired, or crushed in a car accident when he stormed off a while ago.  The urn would have just sat there atop the lockers until someone just happened to spot it.  “Say, what’s that up there?”  “Dunno, looks like garbage.”  “I guess we should throw it away.”  Again, Tom Batiuk wants Bull to have a debilitating condition, but has no idea how to portray that.  It comes and goes when it’s convenient, when it can be used for pity.  Then it disappears until its next cue.

As for why we are now focusing on someone unseen in the strip for years (aside from a very brief appearance last September–of course, as a Les flashback), I have no idea.  It’s not like anyone really cares about the characters abandoned when Act I became Act II.  Tom Batiuk doesn’t seem to care about them.  Boy howdy, does he not care about them:  as BillyTheSkink noted yesterday, this seems to say quite openly that Coach Stropp had no family, or a family that hated him.  There isn’t an another interpretation that looks good for ol’ Stropp.

My assumption is that this is supposed to be a poignant moment here.  It fails.

Gee Quiz

September’s a good time for Batiuk to revisit the place where the Funkiverse began: the high school classroom. We’ve seen the original Westview students grow into middle age, and some of them become teachers to the students who succeeded them. Now that Cody and Owen have finally graduated (and seemingly vanished), TB must come up with “fresh” teen characters to serve as foils for the insufferable Mr. Moore. So far all he’s come up with is the blonde mannequin Logan Church, seen in the last panel giving side-eye to Bernie Silver, who seems to be an amalgam of Owen’s clueless slacker and Cody’s dark hair and glasses.

It’s been a privilege bringing you the snark for the last couple weeks, folks. Billytheskink steps in for the next fortnight. Stay Funky, y’all!

Un-Bear-A-Bull

Link to today’s strip

Blech, imagine being stuck in a car with that cretin. Especially that horrible robin’s egg blue car of his…(shudder). A picture (in so many words) is very very slowly beginning to form here…Linda is “worried” about Bull. Yes, after decades of smirking at his antics in that condescending somewhat bemused way of hers, she’s concerned about her husband’s obesity or mood swings or something. Well, it’s about time. It’s actually a good thing that Linda and Dick Facey never got together, that much wryness would have torn a hole in the fabric of the Funkyverse.

The most hilarious thing about today’s episode is the way BatNom totally butchered the word balloon in panel two. Looks like he ran out of dialog there or something, I’m sort of surprised that he didn’t find some awkward clumsy word salad to fill all that space. Then again, Les is speaking so maybe he just took some mercy on us. Still though, knowing how he operates and all, it’s a pretty glaring anomaly. At least bother to print larger or something, you know?

Rapidly Going From Bad To Much, Much Worse

Link to today’s strip

As much as I ordinarily despise Linda, it’s tough not to feel bad for her today. Her husband is off on some unexplained rage bender, her hair loss seems to be continuing unabated and on top of all that, Les is making his move on her. Look at him, ready to pounce on her during her moment of vulnerability, his hand perversely thrust into his pocket as he blatantly targets her…just repellent. And that rear view of Les’ head with those second-rate Paulie Walnuts wings, thanks for that, TomBan. Back when Bull was dying in front of him on the tennis court Les was flitting around and gloating in the most obnoxious way possible and now he’s pretending to “care”, what a sickening display. What. A. Dick.