Gee Quiz

September’s a good time for Batiuk to revisit the place where the Funkiverse began: the high school classroom. We’ve seen the original Westview students grow into middle age, and some of them become teachers to the students who succeeded them. Now that Cody and Owen have finally graduated (and seemingly vanished), TB must come up with “fresh” teen characters to serve as foils for the insufferable Mr. Moore. So far all he’s come up with is the blonde mannequin Logan Church, seen in the last panel giving side-eye to Bernie Silver, who seems to be an amalgam of Owen’s clueless slacker and Cody’s dark hair and glasses.

It’s been a privilege bringing you the snark for the last couple weeks, folks. Billytheskink steps in for the next fortnight. Stay Funky, y’all!

Un-Bear-A-Bull

Link to today’s strip

Blech, imagine being stuck in a car with that cretin. Especially that horrible robin’s egg blue car of his…(shudder). A picture (in so many words) is very very slowly beginning to form here…Linda is “worried” about Bull. Yes, after decades of smirking at his antics in that condescending somewhat bemused way of hers, she’s concerned about her husband’s obesity or mood swings or something. Well, it’s about time. It’s actually a good thing that Linda and Dick Facey never got together, that much wryness would have torn a hole in the fabric of the Funkyverse.

The most hilarious thing about today’s episode is the way BatNom totally butchered the word balloon in panel two. Looks like he ran out of dialog there or something, I’m sort of surprised that he didn’t find some awkward clumsy word salad to fill all that space. Then again, Les is speaking so maybe he just took some mercy on us. Still though, knowing how he operates and all, it’s a pretty glaring anomaly. At least bother to print larger or something, you know?

Rapidly Going From Bad To Much, Much Worse

Link to today’s strip

As much as I ordinarily despise Linda, it’s tough not to feel bad for her today. Her husband is off on some unexplained rage bender, her hair loss seems to be continuing unabated and on top of all that, Les is making his move on her. Look at him, ready to pounce on her during her moment of vulnerability, his hand perversely thrust into his pocket as he blatantly targets her…just repellent. And that rear view of Les’ head with those second-rate Paulie Walnuts wings, thanks for that, TomBan. Back when Bull was dying in front of him on the tennis court Les was flitting around and gloating in the most obnoxious way possible and now he’s pretending to “care”, what a sickening display. What. A. Dick.

Terribull

Link to today’s strip.

I actually laughed at today’s episode.  Not because of the “joke” or anything, but because of the way Bull is drawn in panel one.  With his oversized head, he looks like a giant, enraged baby.

And the idea of a giant, enraged baby running out onto a football field, arms a-flappin’, all red-faced and colicky, is funnier than anything seen in this strip in a long, long time.

Other than that, now that we’ve gone from three full days of talking about Bull to actually seeing Bull in action, nothing’s really changed.  All this has happened about a hundred times before.  Bull is a terrible coach who hates his players and is certain the season is doomed.  I almost put myself to sleep just typing that out, it’s so boring.  Maybe Tom Batiuk has a point in having characters discuss things off-stage; it saves him having to draw action.

Of course, we’d miss out on the giant, enraged babies dashing out onto the field.  Personally, I’d miss that a lot.

Is Tom Batiuk really going to be doing this for another five and a half years?  Jesus wept.

Good Thing Watch:  that giant, enraged baby.  Every time I look at that, it makes me happy.

We’ve Replaced Humor with Humidor

Link to today’s strip.

(Wikipedia: A humidor is any kind of box or room with constant humidity that is used to store cigars, cigarettes, or pipe tobacco.  Just so you folks don’t have to look it up.)

This is definitely a “What?” strip.  As in, “What kind of thought process arrives at this end?”

Is this in reference to yesterday’s strip, about freshmen in the lake?  Now they use bottles for water, instead of a lake?  If that’s the case, I can’t even.  I mean, the lake thing was just last night, and now everything’s awesome?

Has The Odious Dinkle’s blathering on about himself actually solved the problem of band camp hazing?

Or is this another example of hazing–these girls are forced to drink bottles of water, because hazing?  If that’s the case, why isn’t Becky stopping it, if she’s so goldurn concerned?

Sigh.  I know the answer.  Tom Batiuk saw the word “hydrating” and noticed that both it and “hazing” begin with an “h” and have a couple of vowels in common.  But this isn’t a pun, or even amusing in any way.  It’s not even a malapropism.

If Crankshaft thought of this, even he would not say it.