One Of These Days These Comic Books Are Gonna Comic Book All Over Your Comic Books

Link To Today’s Strip

This is already week five of the Great Chester Hagglemore Batom Comics mega-arc  (oh yeah, it’s a mega-arc  at this point) and they’ve only just now arrived at Hagglemore Manor. I suppose he assumes we “like” Pete and Boy Lisa and thus are amused by their annoying patter and irritating banter but oh how very, very wrong he is. Day after day of mindless chatter, beating around the bush and avoiding the point, which has not yet been made entirely clear. That’s right, there’s a real no-fooling company that will PAY YOU to do this! It’s all a matter of knowing the “right people”, I guess.

I (shudder) went back and (ugh) re-read this arc (it amazing how quickly one forgets a FW weekly arc, isn’t it?) and counting this one I found only five strips that had anything to do with the premise. Chester asks about Pete (Sunday strip), John agrees to get them in touch, Chester texts Pete, Pete mooches ride to Ohio, Pete and Darin arrive at Chester’s. The rest of it was all incomprehensible nonsense about Jessica’s old sex life, the decline of fairy tales and petty theft, none of which could have had any less to do with anything. This is week five, so counting that Sunday strip this is the twenty-seventh strip in this arc. So only 18% of the strips in this arc had any relevance to the story and that’s using a very, very loose definition of “relevant” too. He could have told this entire “story” thus far in a mere five days and even then it would have been as thin as his everyday grip on reality. Just amazing.


Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

19 responses to “One Of These Days These Comic Books Are Gonna Comic Book All Over Your Comic Books

  1. Gerard Plourde

    So is Pete’s line supposed to be humorous? And why is he wearing a tie, let alone in that 1950’s or’60’s “overworked office worker” style?

  2. DOlz

    If the princess from “The Princess and the Pea” had this much padding in the mattresses she never would have felt that pea if had been an anvil.

  3. spacemanspiff85

    Does Chester answer the door himself? And wouldn’t they have already had to introduce themselves to be let into the house? And how is there not a single photo of the guy who used to write Superman on the internet?

  4. billytheskink

    The crazy thing here is, neither one of them are actually Pete Reynolds!

    • Epicus Doomus

      One of the more bizarre continuity gaffes of Act III for sure. Did he just forget? Was it deliberate? And if so, why? Interestingly enough, on the official FW page he’s still “Roberts”…a writer for Marvel Comics no less.

      • spacemanspiff85

        It would be like if in Return of the Jedi everyone referred to Han Solo as Han Solstein with no explanation.
        If you’re going to respond to (entirely justified) critiques of your work with snark like “it’s called writing”, don’t forget your own characters’ names.

        • comicbookharriet

          Pete Roberts always had a rather acrimonious relationship with his birth father Peter Roberts, a man who gave him a name, before skipping out when he was six months old, and every so often would pay just enough child support to keep the cops off his back. He lived 600 miles away and would only call little Petey Jr once every few years on his birthday. Usually at 10:30 PM with a half-hearted two minute phone call, slurring his guilty words through a mix of gingivitis and Wild Irish Rose.

          Unsurprisingly Pete legally changed his name in adulthood to match the last name of the men who actually ‘raised’ him: TV and Movie star Burt Reynolds, and popular science fiction magazine author Mack Reynolds.

        • Epicus Doomus

          LOL…like “All In The Family’s” Archie Bonner, or Homer Sampson, or “MASH’s” Capt. Eagle Eye Polk. I wonder if anyone outside of our little SoSF universe even noticed the name change?

  5. Whatever surname the Mopey One has this week, it seems to me that Chester doesn’t know what he looks like for a reason: to set up witless banter like this.

    • Gerard Plourde

      Also, does The Author think that clearly stating at the outset that if he messes up he’ll look for a fall guy is something Pete thinks is a winning strategy in a job interview?

  6. Chyron HR

    “YOU’RE Pete Reynolds? So much for my plan to breed a race of Aryan supersoldiers using your sperm.”

  7. I like the last panel, where Dullard is offering his hand and Chester pointedly keeps his arms behind his back. Chester knows instinctively that you shouldn’t touch these people.

  8. The Starbuck Jones movie must have had terrible advertising if Chester mistakes Darin for Pete.

  9. Eldon of Galt

    I like being able to set a number to the story’s padding. “Funky Winkerbean, now with 82% useless filler”. Today’s strip is also a good one for setting a number for “smirks per square inch”. And the artwork: Pete and Darin are particularly horrible dough-faced goofballs today.

  10. ian'sdrunkenbeard

    There is an interesting story in the Akron Beacon Journal today about the sale of a collection of 1,100 Silver Age comics. Check out the photos – the comic store owner is sporting a Batman hoodie.

    I wonder if the sellers will move to a mansion with wrought-iron gates and hire a butler to bring them chocolate sundaes (or was that a parfait?).

  11. ian'sdrunkenbeard

    “I was hoping to hire someone local for my new project. I heard you were a couple of immature douche bags, but I thought I’d give you a chance. Now that I’ve met you, I’ve decided to collaborate with Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons. You have ten seconds to vamoose, before Alfred releases the hounds.”

  12. hitorque