Route Canal

Dinkle appears in today’s strip.
No “spoiler alert” tag… this is not a spoiler, it is a warning. You have been warned. Read at your own risk. Or don’t, your life will be better off.

You know what, I’m going to focus on just one small little part of this strip and let our great commenters take the rest of it apart. I’m going to deal only with the first four words that appear in the strip, “Speaking of band candy”.

“SPEAKING OF BAND CANDY”?!
NO ONE was speaking of band candy! No one other than Dinkle is ever speaking of band candy! No one in their right mind wants to speak of band candy! I suppose Dinkle is correct in “saying “speaking of band candy” because that is a 100% accurate description of what he proceeds to do… thus, he most assuredly wanders around uttering “speaking of band candy” whenever he wants to speak of band candy. There is no other possible explanation. I’m typing “speaking of band candy” over and over again in desperate hope that this will be last time those words are ever written. Please. Please.

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18 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

18 responses to “Route Canal

  1. Epicus Doomus

    “East coast band candy route driver”…uh, yeah, whatever you say, Tom. This unholy union of daffy old coots and the WHS marching band doesn’t bode well, my friends. If the reunited marching band does a Starbuck Jones-themed band routine followed by pizza at Montoni’s, well, that might be it for me. Don’t think this can’t possibly get any dumber because it can and it will, bank on it.

    • Rusty Shackleford

      Yeah, nobody ever said band candy route driver either, just another awkward way for Batty to bring a young Dinkle back into the strip.

  2. countoftowergrove

    Raisin the bar of inanity.

  3. The Nelson Puppet

    Panels 1 and 2: “Remember when this comic strip was mildly amusing?”
    Panel 3: “Yeah, it’s not like that anymore.”

  4. billytheskink

    I believe Holly’s mom. Very few things have ever taken as long as this story arc and one of those few things that has was the Atomik Komix arc earlier this decade year.

    It’s like the opposite of that paper towel roll theory on aging, how time seems to speed up as you age.

  5. spacemanspiff85

    Eeeesh. That second panel, with Holly’s mom’s expression combined with her question, has me thinking that she followed it up by stroking his arm and asking if he needed help relieving all the stress of being the World’s Greatest Band Director.

  6. At this point, Funky probably hopes that he’s actually still in a coma and is simply dreaming all of this nonsense.

    • spacemanspiff85

      On Sunday it’s revealed that he’s been dreaming of him and Les as Starbuck Jones and Moon Mile Meek.

  7. Gerard Plourde

    So are we to infer from this that Holly’s mother was never a member of the Westview band? Then why would she be invited to the band alumni reunion? Even as filler this makes no sense.

    • bobanero

      I was thinking the same thing. Either they’re including the Band Moms in the reunion, or Holly’s Mom is part of an older generation of band students that existed before Dinkle. Perhaps even Dinkle was part of their class. Either way, there will probably be no mention of why her presence at the reunion is required, and we’ll continue to be “treated” to extremely awful flashback jokes.

  8. timbuys

    Huh. So, yesterday I said something to the effect that I’d be fine with this BS so long as Dinkle and other abominables weren’t mentioned.

    At least I was correct to note that Dinkle’s continued absence would’ve been a nice development.

  9. Dinkle was an Ohio high school band director. Holly was a majorette. Everyone was in Ohio. So why would Holly’s mom drive the “East Coast”? East Coast of what? This strip gets worse and worse. “It never took this long when I was delivering band candy” would work just as well and is far less stupid.

  10. Buckeye Feculence

    Speaking of euthanasia of nasty senior citizens…

  11. DOlz

    “East coast band candy route driver”, so does make Dinkle the Candyman? His personality makes so much sense now.

    https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0103919/

    OR

    “East coast band candy route driver”, so does make Dinkle the Candyman? That explains how he could afford such an extravagance band program.

    https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/candyman

  12. spacemanspiff85

    Did it weird anyone else out that she’s referring to him as “Mr. Dinkle” given that she looks to be older than him, or at the very least his age?

  13. ian'sdrunkenbeard

    I like today’s strip. (Cough, choke!) I thought of Mrs. Budd driving up and down the east coast peddling band candy. Is she driving a station wagon? Maybe a panel truck? Then I flashed back to those hyperbolic days of yore, when the hall monitor desk was armed with a .30 caliber machine gun. She’s got to be driving a Peterbilt hauling a 40 foot trailer filled with delicious, glorious, holy band candy.

    “Breaker, breaker. I got the band candy if you got the cash. I’ll be at the rest stop at mile 375 at 0900. I’ve got a lot of deliveries to make, so be there, good buddy.”

    • ian'sdrunkenbeard

      When TB reads a post like this, I’m sure he smirks, nods, and says, “Now this guy gets it.”

      The 3rd panel today should have been sepia with photo corners, depicting Mrs. Budd at the wheel of a semi, with a trucker’s cap perched atop her lacquered do.