Kids these days, with their shenanigans and whatnots! If it’s not gluing a quarter to the floor it’s vandalizing a car like in today’s strip. Nothing says light-hearted mischief like a $2200 detailing bill. What’s next? The classic “lit newspaper in the mailslot” trick?
Woohoo! Go Seniors!
So…for Les, life is watching blonde women interact with their lockers while he endlessly walks down a brick corridor. Or some damn thing–who honestly knows what the point of this strip is supposed to be. I’m starting to think that Tom Batiuk is simply trolling us (as others here have pointed out). I’ve read this episode over carefully and I cannot make head nor tail out of it. Is the point supposed to be “High school lasts forever”? Is it that Les hates his job because it makes his life Hell? Is it that hairstyles on blondes are getting shorter? (Panel four must be from a previous year, since Les is dressed differently.) Or is the point that, every time the school year starts, there are blonde women with lockers–only, get this, the women are different each time! Really, that sounds the most plausible but it’s weak, even for this strip.
So, I don’t get this one. I honestly thought we’d get the “bullying” arc started up again, but I guess Mr. Batiuk thought we needed some Les Wisdom(c) dropped on us. Too bad he forgot the Les Wisdom Decoder Ring(c) to go with it. It just looks like a hellscape to me, with a pair of word balloons pasted on. (Look at that dialogue. Tell me than any random sentences couldn’t substitute there and make the same amount of sense.)
Sorry for rambling, but I don’t see this one as an “episode.” Instead I see things like the adult Les’ face in the “Westview Class” masthead image among all the teenagers and I think, Is that supposed to mean something? Les has always been old? Then I note that in the penultimate panel, Les’ hair is all disheveled, and it’s neatly combed in the last panel. Again, is there a point to that?
I do like the Modigliani face in panel five, and I like that someone went nuts with the Scotch tape in panel three. And all those bricks. Endless bricks.
Bricks.
Ah, I get it now. We’re supposed to want to slam endless bricks against Les’ head. Okay!
Thus ends my time in the Les Chair. Tomorrow, the fabulous DavidO takes over the hosting duties…and good luck to him!
See you then, and thank you for your indulgence!
I guess all the bird-themed dialogue is telling us that Chullo and Glasses are bird-brains. Got it. Although Glasses’ riposte makes no sense whatsoever. Is this his version of “Whatever”? Because he looks more anxious than dismissive.
Also, since Glasses is wearing a Marvel-themed t-shirt, and Tom Batiuk has gone out of his way to tell us he’s a DC guy, I think that means he’s supposed to be evil. Or maybe it’s more payback to Stan Lee for writing the forward for the new Funky Winkerbean collection. Those boots won’t lick themselves!
The only interesting thing here is that kid’s hair in panel two. Is she wearing a hat, or a plastic bag, or has she dyed part of her hair blue, or what? Does she have a chullo? Wedgeman could probably tell us, but since he was a senior last year, he has gone into the abyss…or at least, he should have. What do you want to bet that he shows up anyway, because continuity is for losers.
Hey gang, it is I, Epicus, ready to steer the S.S. SoSF through a magical journey where time and newsprint collide in a cavalcade of…well, not really. It’s just another whacked-out FW arc. But still.
Apparently the muttering mailman comic book store lackey Harry is mindlessly jabbering about some sort of “time pool” he had stashed in his super-secret high school locker. Wonder if there’s a Pulitzer in there? Probably not….ZING! Just when you didn’t think it would be possible for the huge reunion arc to get any dumber, here you go. If you were born after 1980 this probably makes no sense whatsoever to you, but trust me, by the end of the week it won’t be much clearer.
In case you’ve already forgotten about the last time travel arc, Funky went into a coma after turning down a vodka and orange after dumping Pa Bean at Bedside Manor, during which he visited his younger self and advised his younger self to purchase a copy of “Starbuck Jones” #1, which he used to save his business after cocking it all up somehow (which happened way before the coma, BTW). Then that bit of drollery was forgotten and all of a sudden SJ # 576 (or whatever) was the priceless collectible one. I know, but seriously, that’s how it happened. Betcha this one is WAY better than that one was!!!
Harry suddenly seems confused and agitated and is speaking nonsensically, suggesting a neurological or psychotic event. Holly, rather than becoming alarmed, calmly and resignedly responds. She’s seen it before: not only for countless hours standing behind the counter as Harry guzzled free coffee and held court in Montoni’s, but even back in high school, where he was constantly doing weird shit like inviting the gang into his locker.
Son of Stuck Funky 