Darin – Page 29 – Son of Stuck Funky

The Third Entry is When the Quality Drops

Folks, you’re not going to believe this, but for the third time during this stint, the strip is unavailable for preview! Now, don’t worry, don’t worry–everyone please, just remain calm. Your entertainment will be guaranteed by the Department of Redundancy Department, and the Natural Guard. Just proceed, calmly, down to the ticket booth and ask for Principal Poop and he will cheerfully, and decidedly, refund the unused portion of the money you spent to attend tonight’s episode. Because here at Son of Stuck Funky, it’s a fair for all, and no fare to anybody!

I know Tom Batiuk thinks highly of his own work–he’s always giving himself award nominations, after all–but he really treats this stuff like it’s rare jewels, unfit for unveiling before a crass and ignorant public (those people who–gah–prefer attempted entertainment to underthought polemic) until he absolutely has to display his wares. I’m sure he washes his hands after clicking “Send.”

I put it to you that a person proud of the effort he put into his work wouldn’t hesitate to display it. A person who, on the other hand, is ridden with cynicism and resentment, and puts the bare minimum of effort required in order to cash a check, would likely not draw attention to what he produces. Not naming any names or anything.

And if I had to guess, I’d say we have more “words spoken” between Dullard and Peeved. Because I ain’t gonna call it “witty dialogue” when it’s nothing like that.

The New Post Office Arc!

Link to today’s strip.

Chuck Ayers is back doing the art, at least for this week, and his stuff is much better rendered than Buchett’s has been lately. It’s still not what I would call good, but it at least looks like effort was put into it.

It’s amazing that Tom Batiuk has so much going on that he has to farm the artwork out to three different people, yet he can’t concoct an engaging storyline to save his life. Take this one–so Dullard is off to the post office. I remember one time someone went to the post office, and it blew up! “USA! USA!” The last time Dullard went, though, he took weeks to open a letter. I doubt we’ll get any explosions this time around.

These characters have the astonishing super-power of being totally boring at all times. I’d rather see Funky at the gym.

On Monday the Angels Start Weeping

Link to today’s strip.

Monday begins a new cycle, so today’s strip was not immediately available. I’m going to guess we’re going to get more Cliff Anger garbage, because Batiuk seems particularly fond of that of late. Of course, ever since Becky’s mother was left on top of a scissor-lift many years ago, I’ve learned not to be too sure of my predictions.

According to the dialogue yesterday, Cindy actually won an Emmy for her Cliff Anger documentary. I ought to find this surprising for a number of reasons. For one thing, I’m not sure an internet gossip site really qualifies, but never mind that. I don’t know the rules for the Emmys. The fact that Cindy learned nothing about Cliff (her viewers learned nothing either) makes me wonder about the quality of the work, and why it was thought award-worthy. All we saw was people sitting in chairs chatting. Probably Baituk shares the same low-level contempt for television that once marked one as “sophisticated,” and he feels that there are no significant awards unattached to comic books. And of course, Cindy won and accepted her award entirely off-stage (that oughta show ‘er).

Still, I keep thinking the award was announced thusly: “And the award goes to….Cindy Jarre, for Six Decades of Idiocy: The Cliff Anger Story! Congratulations, Cindy, you’ve won the Emmy Award for Best Chairs!”

Pity Party for Two.

Link to Today’s Comic.

It seems that Darin and Jess weren’t in yesterday’s strip because Darin stomped out in a huff after not getting his coveted award. After all, and Eisner has been the lifelong dream of this business major who only fell into storyboarding after a friend suggested it offhand.

Tommy Bats seems hesitant to put this bitterness in the mouth of Les, sainted as he is by association. He’s lately split his author avatar in two. The younger Darin can be the raw id of jealousy, anger, and pride. Les is the older and ‘wiser’ superego so his response to defeat is depression, self-pity, and fatalism.

The Han Solo joke is so throwaway, the ghost of a reminder this was supposed to be Batiuk’s Comic-Con tie in strip for the year.

Sloppy Second Place.

Link to Today’s Comic.

So Tom at least realized that is would be beyond crass to have ‘Lisa’s Story’ WIN the award. We’ve learned something about the lines he will and wont cross.

But when you thought the plotline couldn’t get any weirder or more half-assed, we don’t get to see the announcing of the award, or the immediate reaction. We jump from before the award being announced to some time following later.

I would hate to be Tom’s wife, the man has trouble experiencing a climax. Everything is foreplay to him, followed by a blackout and then an awkward denouement. Since his massive Atomic Komix startup saga tapered off even his foreplay has been perfunctory. Perhaps we are entering the era of endless quickies, shorter and shorter storylines eventually turning the strip back into the one shot comic it once was.

Panel One: Cayla hands her ‘Honey’ divorce papers.
Panel Two: Les drinks while being insulted by an imaginary cat.
Panel Three: Les asks out an attractive woman at a book fair.