COTTON (Gary Cole): “Good evening, sports fans, Cotton McKnight here, coming to you live from Village Booksmith in Centerville, Ohio, welcoming you to the finals of the World’s Smuggest Man competition! Live on ESPN8, The Ocho. And with me as always, my partner in crime: Pepper Brooks!”
PEPPER (Jason Bateman): “Yo! What’s up, Cot? Fist bump!”
Continue reading “ESPN 8 The Ocho Presents: The World’s Smuggest Man Competition”Harriet promised you an epic screed from me about this week’s shenanigans. This isn’t that screed, but it’s coming. In part because I want to be 100% sure there’s no second week of this arc. So right now, this is a quick TBTropes entry about the finale of the arc about the festival of Ohio-related books. I refuse to give them any more free advertising space than Tom Batiuk already has. Continue reading “Jumped The Comic Book”
Spaceman Spiff jinxed me yesterday! But joke’s on him, I’m not even going to talk about today’s dumb Dinkle strip.
Why?
Well, I and others on this blog have long admired the blog Mary Worth and Me. It has been going strong for 15 years, all helmed by the esteemed blogmeister, Wanders. The undoubted highlight of each year on the blog is the Worthy Awards, which just wrapped up voting. Many have expressed a desire to see a similar event for Funky Winkerbean.
This year, Son of Stuck Funky is proud to announce the first ever Funky Awards!
Votes will be accepted through midnight January 16th. Winners will be announced throughout the following week.
Vote Early! Vote Often! Vote HERE!
Before we present our nominees, I would like to take a moment to thank Wanders. I reached out to him for pointers on how to set these up, and he responded with the kind of humor and advice that would have made Mary herself proud.
I know that I speak for all of us here at Son of Stuck Funky when I extend my heartfelt condolences to the Mary Worth community as they mourn today’s tragic cruise ship death of strip regular Wilbur Weston.
And now onto the nominees!
The Thatsnot Hewmore Award for Standout Unnamed Character
1.) Referential Heckler
2.) Suffering Saint Nursing Assistant
3.) Average Comics Fan
4.) Mature Comic Con Attendee
5.) Zombie Orderly
6.) Oblivious Parade Spectator
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The Livinia Memorial Award for Achievements in Feminism
1.) Women Be Shopping
2.) Women Be Changing Their Minds
3.) Women Be Jealous
4.) Women Be Catty
5.) Women Be Another Species Entirely
6.) Women Be Tiny and Disappearing in the Background
***
The Backpfeifengesicht Award for Most Punchable Les Moore
1.) Remembering Old Friends (For the First Time in Years)
2.) A Single “Manly” Tear
3.) No True Sports-Fan Fallacy
4.) Self-Centered Stage
5.) Deadly Pundemic
6.) The Smile on My Face
7.) Interacting With Fans
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Most Puzzling Continuity Questions of 2021
1.) Who Directs the Community Band?
2.) What is Rachel’s Major?
3.) Who Did the Dinkles Have for Thanksgiving?
4.) Are the Reindeer Broken or is Tony Dead?
5.) Was Phil Holt Really a Ghost?
6.) Where Are the Kids? Who Are the Kids?
7.) What Even Is Continuity?
***
Story Arc of the Year
1.) Dinkle Joins the Choir
2.) ‘Lisa’s Story: The Movie’ Wraps and Flops
3.) Phil Holt: Resurrections
4.) The Winkerbeans Rehab, Reno, and Recover
5.) Tom Worships Idols of Silver
***
The Panel of the Year
1.) The Final Note
2.) Rare Flying Discman
3.) Take THAT History!
4.) Smoking Vader
5.) Les Waterboards Himself
6.) Eros Panoptes
7.) Stag Film
8.) Pizza Box Signal
***
The Best Funky Winkerbean Strip 0f 2021
1.) Expensive Equipment
2.) Accessorizing
3.) The Joys of Reading Over 50
4.) Interdisciplinary Thinking
5.) Funkyverse in a Cookieshell
6.) I’ve Seen Things You People Wouldn’t Believe
***
The Worst Funky Winkerbean Strip of 2021
1.) War of the Word Zeppelins
2.) Post Pandemic Doom Posting
3.) ‘Disappointed a Lot of Fans’
4.) Feeling Blue
5.) Randy Old Man
6.) Gross Randy Old Man
7.) Just Gross
Once again, vote HERE! Voting ends January 16th.
Son of Stuck Funky 
