SosfDavidO here, Guest Hosting for the week!
Hoo-boy. Two middle-aged clone women prattling on about comic books, what’s not to like about today’s strip?
And just to save people the trouble… The Y Chromosome on Wikipedia.
From the entry:
“The Y chromosome is one of two sex chromosomes (allosomes) in mammals, including humans, and many other animals.”
I can see why TomBat couldn’t pass up a comedy goldmine like this! The strip practically writes itself!
Pretty weak word-play in panel three…yawn…what I’m curious about is Funky’s statement in panel two. Really? He…he–Funky– uh, gets emotional? “Pretty Emotional”? Really? I mean, honestly, no foolin’? Emotional–Funky Winkerbean? Tears in his eyes blurring his vision–as, um, opposed to the food court thing, where Funky was like, Dad, eat your Mall Food Court Sammich. Damn you. And now…How, exactly?
Talking to his dad about Dad’s diet of coffin nails, he seemed more–well, alarmed than sad. Like, Oh crap, I’ll probably have to , argh, you know, INTERACT with this “Dad” guy (shudder) way more than I wanna. Funky’s downright phlegmatic most of the time, showing it with his rarely-changing mask of a resigned, weary face. In the (cough) actual panels we saw with Pa Winkerbean, Funky didn’t look sad. He looked like someone had just told him he’d have to stay an extra half hour, as the staff was still cleaning Pa’s room. And they were really concerned about the toilet…
Hands up, everyone who didn’t see this coming a mile away. Let’s see–that’s one, two, three–OMG, you people are going to have to see me after class if you have any hope of passing the mid-term. Or that kidney stone. I’ll let you choose which is less painful.
Of course, if, in a strip from next week, Cory returns home and, before it can land, that helicopter blows up, why, that would be great and I would personally buy Tom Batiuk a beer. Of course, odds of that happening with the sacred cast are probably as close to zero as you can get without squinting.
Now if, as some have speculated, Rocky ends up dead or maimed, well…she’ll fit in nicely with Kerry, Carla, that biker dude who sold comics, and the rest of the anonymous horde who only serve to illustrate the troubles of the Funky Winkerbean cast in a greater arena before disappearing into their respective hells. IE, it might be used to briefly illustrate a point, but then they and their sufferings will be shuffled quietly off-stage, never to be seen again. After all, Les Moore, after all.
And before you ask, yes, I was going to call shenanigans on Holly’s surprise, since her cellphone probably flashed “Cory Winkerbean” when it rang, but…then I thought, perhaps Cory is using someone else’s phone. Or perhaps the Winkerbeans never store anything in their contacts, or use different ring-tones, or any number of other stupid reasons why I hate writing about these people. It is, after all, evil technology(R)(C), use of which is prohibited.
The wrap-up, here, of this arc (I am being optimistic) illustrates one of the major problems this strip has–it’s so static. Nothing ever really changes. Oh sure, Khahn moves away, Dopey Pete moves away, Cindy moves back…but those are all relatively trivial. Since the death of Lisa, Tom Batiuk seems to have decided that this strip is just going to drift along on weak wordplay, smirks and depressive smacks to the head until someone in quality control notices what they’re paying for. I guess payments for Funky Winkerbean are like the paychecks for Milton from Office Space. Someday, someone will fix the glitch.
Perhaps I’m just someone bummed out because my favorite character, the Pouncing Darkness, is brutally dispatched over the course of today’s offering. Farewell, Darkness! I’ll–I’ll never forget you! And I’ll vote for your Pulitzer!
Yes! My favorite Funky Winkerbean character ever, the Pouncing Darkness, makes his appearance brilliantly in the last panel–crawling toward Holly as the phone begins to ring.
In ordinary circumstances, I guess this storyline would resonate with folks who have loved ones overseas in combat zones. One would never know from moment to moment what might be. Every news story might contain heartbreak, every phone call might be the beginning of regret and mourning.
The thing is, though, this is Funky Winkerbean. The story will play out as lame, predictable and underwhelming. Three things that people in dire circumstances don’t really need.
I will give Tom Batiuk some slight credit here and say that his heart is probably in the right place. However, using Cory Winkerbean as an object of sympathy is never going to play. He was a rotten kid before he went into the army, and while the army may have changed him for the better, it would be good to, you know, actually show us this. Even though that–actually showing something–goes against the very nature of this strip, still, a leopard should at least try to change his spots, before deciding it can’t be done…
Again, another baby step. The suspense would be killing me…if it wasn’t resting on the sofa, eating chips and watching Three Stooges shorts while I’m over here trying to type.
I do like how the darkness just encroaches, panel by panel, until Funky and Holly are completely surrounded, and about to be blotted out of their sorry existence. I’d like to offer some genuine, non-ironic praise for Tom Batiuk’s artistic choice in rendering today’s effort. Well done!
Son of Stuck Funky 