Aw! Little Skyler Fairgood’s only a week old, but he’s already talking and using a laptop! What? That giant-headed human is not baby Skyler but is in fact Our Cory? My bad.
Tag: Holly
Back at Montoni’s Already!?
Welcome to the world, kid! The whole damn thing smells like garlic and stale bread. Poor Skyler. It’s almost unavoidable from the looks of today’s strip that he’s going to be a 20 year old dishwasher at Montoni’s, destined to have his wife deliver her baby there, too, shortly after they have their wedding there.
Does anyplace exist in Westview at all any more?! Why is this strip not called “Montoni’s and Moore” ?!
“Rent” Control
TFH here, tippin’ the ol’ SoSF K-pot to Beckoning Chasm for two weeks of outstanding guest posting! Guest host DavidO brings the snark for a couple weeks starting tomorrow.
Before anyone asks: I’m not going to add “rents” (slang for parents) to the Batiuktionary…I actually have heard this usage (once) in real life, and it can also be found in that context on Google and Urban Dictionary. Now that we got that out of the way: war-torn Afghanistan provides the reader a welcome respite from the Taj Moore-hal. TB trusts us (for once) to discern that one of these interchangeable, faceless soldiers is none other than Our Cory. The soldiers having apparently exhausted every other topic for small talk, conversation now turns to the “rents” (in the past tense for reasons unknown). “They constantly invented new ways to be annoying.” At least they’re inventive; meanwhile their Creator constantly annoys by cycling and recycling the same tired tropes. The band director’s changed but being in the band is still an ordeal. The Scapegoats’ standout footballer is now the coach, but the team still loses. War was hell for Wally (who went MIA twice) and will no doubt be hell for cousin Cory.
Sunday In The Park With Joe
I’ve always been a fan of Joe Staton. He currently draws the “Dick Tracy” newspaper strip, and drew a comic book I used to read back in the day, E-Man. I actually first encountered his work in–believe it or not–the old Amazing Stories science fiction magazine. His style tends to be loose and casual, but he always knew exactly where the focus should be in the image, and he has a great sense of dynamics.
I mention all this only because his work is the only interesting thing in today’s offering. The corner bit from Tom Batiuk is basically the pimple on a model’s face. Although Mr. Staton doesn’t seem to’ve put a great deal of effort into this…I’m not sure if the robot he’s cradling was a friend or foe. His arm wrapped around Starbuck says “poor fallen friend” but his feet seem to be pointed toward “fiendish foe, who nearly had me.”
Although, I do think I’ve figured out why Tom Batiuk’s dialogue is so horrible. I think he believes that his readership consists solely of people who have never read Funky Winkerbean before, and who have no intention of reading it the next day.
Tom Batiuk also thinks that this thing called “continuity” or “consistency” is a sucker’s game. Remember last week, how issue seven was the only thing lacking in Cory’s care package? Well, now Holly is “collecting” more. (I’m pretty sure it’s impossible to collect a single issue of something and figure your task is “completed” unless you’ve set your goals pretty low.) You knew the pain wasn’t going to be just one week long, didn’t you? If I recall correctly, there were to be seven Starbuck Jones comic covers presented to us over the course of this arc.
And if each of those covers gets its own Sunday page, well, you can do the math I’m sure. At least we’ll see some artists whose work should be far, far better than the usual Sunday strips.
Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe this is the start of a globe-hopping adventure, a la Indiana Jones, as Holly travels the far corners of the earth to track down the complete set of Starbuck Jones comics.
…ah, ha ha ha ha ha. I crack myself up sometimes.
Rocky Road
And now, we see the big reveal as the mysterious “Rocky” is unveiled to us. To give Tom Batiuk credit, it is a genuine surprise. To take back a bit of that credit, though, it’s mainly a surprise because I’ve never heard of anyone named “Roxanne” who chooses to go by the name “Rocky.” It’s generally “Roxy” isn’t it?
The surprise is also unexpected because we’ve never really been given any reason to care who Rocky might be. I note that no one in the comments this week has hazarded any guesses about Rocky–Rocky has always been referred to as “he.” And why not? The focus of this arc has been on comic books, with nothing much about Cory and Friends other than their sudden interest in those comic books. If Funky or Holly said, “Say, who is this ‘Rocky’ anyway?” that would have laid the groundwork for today’s strip; as it is, it literally comes out of nowhere. It’s as if, in tomorrow’s strip, Carla should say “Oh, by the way, I used to be a man,” well, that will be a surprise as well. (That’s if Carla survives for another day. Her descent from “looks like a Popeye character” in panel one to “prop from a horror film” in panel three is pretty alarming.)
By contrast, Holly’s appearance has been consistent enough that I wonder if Tom Batiuk simply has a set of Holly colorforms that he just moves around.
Another thing for which Mr. Batiuk deserves credit is that Rocky actually appears to be attractive (as much as we can tell in the artwork). However, I have to dock points here as well, because, if you look closely you’ll see that Rocky is also smirking.
Son of Stuck Funky 