The “new year” is about 10% over, but today’s strip doesn’t care.
So Dinkle has a basement full of unsold band candy… but just last year he was flown to Belgium and received an award for being the Van Houten chocolate company’s all-time biggest purchaser. That might seem odd, but I’ve actually seen something similar before. I believe the prosecutor called it “money laundering”.
“Then Mr. Dinkle came into the girls locker room and told us to get “backwards dressed”. You know what, I’m beginning to think there might be something slightly amiss about that guy!”. And during the trip to Pasadena they vomited instead of eating and sat outside the bus, which of course was going in reverse. Then later in life you decided to re-marry so you chose the opposite of someone you liked and were attracted to then let yourself go completely instead of making an effort to be healthy. We get it.
BatNard should try writing these FW strips backwards, starting with an actual joke first then working his way back. That way perhaps one of them might eventually include one. Why are they letting Holly hijack Christmas (and Morton’s glory) with these inane and totally pointless Dinkle stories? I guess the idea here was to do a sort of “you wanna hear about Dinkle? Well, do I have some Dinkle stories for you!” kind of thing but absolutely no one was demanding more Dinkle stories so why he went off on this particular tangent at this particular time is beyond me. His endless need to constantly re-establish the basic traits of characters he’s been doing for forty-plus years is downright intelligence-insulting. Everyone already knows that Dinkle is an annoying nut who’s always capable of doing something wacky, there’s no need for unrelated characters to drone on about him for days on end.
Son of Stuck Funky 
