The Unfair Penitent.

Link to Today’s Comic.

Yes Funky, you are living proof that your father had intercourse with your mother at least once. That is, in fact, how humans reproduce. Not the asexual budding process that you seemed to have assumed for the first sixty years of your life. I would say we need a paternity test to be sure it was Mort who knocked on heaven’s door to bring to earth your doughy face, but given the the family resemblance, we can safely go with Nasus semper certa est.

This is nearly unbearable. However, let us at least attempt to learn and grow from our pain.

According to Webster’s online: “Lothario comes from The Fair Penitent (1703), a tragedy by Nicholas Rowe. In the play, Lothario is a notorious seducer, extremely attractive but beneath his charming exterior a haughty and unfeeling scoundrel. He seduces Calista, an unfaithful wife and later the fair penitent of the title. After the play was published, the character of Lothario became a stock figure in English literature. For example, Samuel Richardson modeled the character of Lovelace on Lothario in his 1748 novel Clarissa. As the character became well known, his name became progressively more generic, and since the 18th century the word lothario has been used for a foppish, unscrupulous rake.”


Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

15 responses to “The Unfair Penitent.

  1. ian'sdrunkenbeard

    SOSF. You’ll come for the snark. You’ll stay for the lesson in English literature.

    Nicholas Rowe, (born June 20, 1674, Little Barford, Bedfordshire, England—died December 6, 1718, London), English writer who was the first to attempt a critical edition of the works of Shakespeare. Rowe succeeded Nahum Tate as poet laureate in 1715 and was also the foremost 18th-century English tragic dramatist, doing much to assist the rise of domestic tragedy.

    You made me learn something today. Thanks, CBH!

  2. billytheskink

    “Well, Funky could be adopted…”, you might think. But the more you think about the possibility, the less sense it makes. Who would choose to make Funky their son?

  3. Epicus Doomus

    Sneaking smokes behind the physical therapy wing, wailing on the slide trombone, boning his way through Bedside Manor…it’s nice to see that Morty’s “Funzheimer’s” disease hasn’t yet re-morphed into the other sad kind.

    Seriously though, what generated THIS idea? With all the loose ends he has hanging he opted to do a father-son STD-centric arc featuring Funky and his father? What a sicko.

  4. redsnifit

    I kind of fell of keeping up with this strip because it’s so fucking boring, but yesterday’s strip pulled me back in. My god lol.

  5. Paul Jones

    Exactly how is it funny that a man in his mid fifties is too stupid to consider the idea that his parents had sex?

  6. Ray

    “Lothario” eh…I would have used “whoremonger”, but I guess that’s why TB is an artist and I work in a factory. 🤔

  7. Rusty

    I guess instead of hanging around high schools to get story ideas, he now hangs around convalescent homes. What’s next, jokes about the cafeteria food?

  8. timbuys

    I appreciate the malicious mischief that was worked by whomever informed TB a year or so ago that his dad one time diddled his mom but, whether intentionally or not, this prankster has managed to get TB to foist off even more of his issues with his parents upon an unsuspecting newspaper comic reading audience.

  9. CBH’s entry is more informative and interesting than the last 20 years of Funky.

    What is it about Batiuk and “wacky old people”?

  10. hitorque

    1. Um… A generic five-minute missionary poke after the Jack Paar Show with your generic suburban wife in your generic suburban marriage doesn’t make you King of All Pimps, does it?

    2. It’s funny because in some weirdo bizarro universe, Morton Winkerbean would be a lecher at best and a perverted deviant groper/rapist at worst and he would have long been sent away to a more *secure* care home…

  11. Given all the recent sexual assault news in the last year or so (especially given the author’s claim to write the strip a year in advance), doing a story about a randy old Lothario seems remarkably tone-deaf and tasteless.

    • timbuys

      “remarkably tone-deaf and tasteless”

      Wow did you ever so succinctly nail the Batomik Comics brand with that one… Nicely done!

    • hitorque

      Please… I wouldn’t be shocked if TB still hasn’t heard yet that Lebron delivered a championship to Cleveland…

  12. ian'sdrunkenbeard

    “When Dad told me he was exhausted from doing the old in-out, I thought he was talking about playing the trombone!”