Burgers and Brats

As a reader of Funky Winkerbean, I’ve grown used to Tombat expecting us to know (and care) about every single one of Westview’s 16,934 citizens and have memorized their backstory in excruciating detail. But now that we’ve done that, it appears Batuik is throwing a few dozen assorted Hollywood characters into the mix! Characters who might have an entire week devoted to them only to completely disappear forever, like what may happen to the starlet in today’s strip.

Then again, any one of these seemingly random people could be John Darling’s love child, here to give Lisa’s Story the fitting screen treatment it deserves.

At this rate, the next time jump’s cast page is going to resemble a damn Where’s Waldo puzzle!

wheres-waldo

 

It’s The Stoppit Show

SosfdavidO here, totally, completely fooled into thinking this unlikely scenario is actually happening, despite Jupiter Moon’s not-so-gentle nudge to the reader that, hey, with the black and white comic, the ridiculous premise and now me saying “I can’t believe this is real” this is totally, totally really happening and is Funky canon.

That’s a problem with today’s strip. We all know it’s Cindy dreaming, or maybe Buddy the dog, since it’s black and white, but damn it, this is *not* unfolding in real time in any actual reality, Funkyverse or otherwise. And we’re going to have to slog through until Saturday (or more) to find that out.

I can’t believe this is happening. Again.

Black and White and Red All Over

SosofDavidO here, taking the reins for a week or two!

Wow, Cindy, who knew your fiancee’s movie would include a romantic interlude! Here in today’s strip We see Cindy’s fuming face in full black and white as she tries to cope with “the other woman.”

Hey, be glad, Cindy, this is the PG-13 era of the 2000s and not the early 80s, where action movies were almost all R-Rated and were so not only for insane violence but for topless female shower scenes and sexual situations that seemed to go on FOREVER, especially if you were an uncomfortable 13 year old boy watching these movies with your parents in the room.

To The Moon, Alice

Despite hatching the title “In The Clutches Of Queen Morphine!”, TB breaks from his typical tone in today’s strip. Yes, what sounds like the title of an Act II addiction-awareness pamphlet written by Mopey Pete, or something else right up TB’s alley, is actually a setup for some cheesecake space action. Weird.

Anyways, Cindy is still jealous, Mason still oblivious, and this whole Starbuck Jones movie deal is still ridiculous. There was no resolution this week… I’m afraid to see what might come next. Walt Kelly help us all.

I would like to thank everyone but Tom Batiuk for these last couple of weeks. Taking over tomorrow will be, your friend and mine, the nonpareil DavidO.

Sonnetday, October 1

A sonnet I’ve written for today’s strip
Which was not available for preview
As such, I can’t really comment or quip
And must leave the snarking up to all you

I suppose I could guess what happens next
With this strip, I’m not sure that’s very hard
Cindy will sulk, leaving us readers vexed
Despite the years leaving her barely marred

Her insecure behavior knows no end
We’ve seen it on multiple weeks this year
That is an awful lot of time to spend
On the terrible gag that’s Cindy’s fear

One hopes this story arc ends here and now
Unless next week is about Les, somehow