Ugh-mblebrag

Oh, of course today’s strip is going to drag the Bedside Manor band back into this. I had my fingers crossed that something else would happen, but really, who didn’t see this coming? Hopefully we’ll get the lucid Mort Winkerbean this time.

I hope the Bedside Manor ensemble’s ill-fated record deal involved a lot of Sousa marches, or at least a slow-paced take on The Ballad Of The Green Berets, because they’ve got less than a week to rehearse. Looks like Dinkle’s about to write a check that his baton can’t cash.

The background characters almost make up for it all, though. Almost.
Let’s see… we’ve got Wooly Willy, Hawaiian giraffe-man, the no-neck dad from “Dustin”, and a blonde smart enough to hide her face so she can always deny having been an extra in Funky Winkerbean. I would much rather be dropping in on their conversations.

Back To Square One

Oh good, TB doesn’t have Lefty lollygag in explaining her community band problem in today’s strip. Yeah, it’s a stupid problem and it could have easily been explained in yesterday’s strip, but we also very well could have spent a week getting to this point. Unfortunately, I expect we’re still spending a week with these two.

Ah, the national community band competition… a great American 4th of July-ish tradition. Yes indeed, it’s up there with Coney Island hot dog eating contest and the international stingray decoration show and that thing Jimmy Smits used to host on public television.

In the reality that is recorded on the internet, I was able to find two things comparable to Lefty’s competition, but nothing exactly like it:

Note your cuts of meat

Hello folks, billytheskink back for another round of kicking off our daily deconstruction of the Batiukverse. As always, I hope to facilitate a strong discussion by highlighting key aspects of each comic and offering a basic analysis to be exapnded upon in the comments. When today’s strip sends that plan off the rails in a few seconds, I will likely resort to comparing the characters to various basketball players from the 1970s or reciting the specs of vintage Macintoshes.

Harry Dinkle is hosting a barbeque, which is a new thing for him… I think. Probably a new thing, given how overdone those hamburgers look. The phrase “Harry Dinkle barbeque” sounds like a setup on a hidden camera show aimed at 7-year olds. What a Harry Dinkle barbeque entails however, making poorly-timed complaints about the community band, sounds like a setup on a hidden camera show aimed at nobody.

Anyways, did you know?
– That the Macintosh IIfx, released in 1990, ran at an impressive 40 MHz and would remain the fastest Macintosh in existence until the release of the Quadra 840av in 1993. Originally priced at $9,900, the Macintosh IIfx cost roughly as much as a new, base model Ford Tempo in 1990.
– That Harry Dinkle did not become the “World’s Greatest Band Director” until after he changed his last name from Dinkl?

Achilles’ Last Stand

You know who really does deserve a Pulitzer? Whoever came up with that blurb “Funky Winkerbean is a reality-based comic strip that depicts contemporary issues affecting young adults in a thought-provoking and sensitive manner.” That is, if there’s a Pulitzer Price for bullshit.

Epicus Doomus
June 24, 2016 at 10:29 pm
And of course we all know [Mason wanting to add an “e” to his last name] will never, ever be mentioned again…

Each time TB squanders ink and newsprint on a strip where Les and Funky go running, it’s the same question: why does Funky do it if he derives no benefit? Les appears to be reasonably fit (at least compared to Funky). He’s not spraying plewds everywhere (“plewds“, by the way, are the droplets of sweat we see in cartoons). Although that might be attributed to Les’ sweatband, which he wears so tightly that it appears to be deforming his skull.

On the heels of bringing you the last couple weeks of snark, yours truly feels like Funky does after one of his runs! Fortunately, billytheskink will be tagging in to go mano a mano with the mind of Batiuk for the next fortnight. Thanks as always for reading, commenting, and sharing the pain.

 

Stick “E” Note

How serious is Mason Jarr about becoming Mason Jarre? Taping-a-letter-e-to-the-back-of-his-chair serious! Of course, from where they’re standing/sitting, Cindy and Pete can’t see that, but Mason’s thoughtful pose speaks volumes. In fact, I’m going to go sit in a chair and assume that same pose and ponder why the hell we invest more thought, time, and effort into the Funkiverse than does Tom Batiuk.