Montoni's – Page 51 – Son of Stuck Funky

Ten Pounds of Words in a Five Pound Bag

Greetings, fellow snarkers, ’tis I, BChasm, filling in for Fearless Leader. Yes, for the next week or two, I get to drive the garbage truck!

And what a load we have today. Look at that giant overflowing bag in panel two! Someone doesn’t know how to properly stuff a garbage can. How about, “The hard part was keeping it a secret from you”? I know, I know, the word balloon was drawn a year ago and the text to fill it was worked out only a couple of weeks back, but come on, man.

At any rate, it does give us a clue why Harry and Harriet are celebrating their anniversary at Montoni’s. Harry was only pretending to be cheap and pretending to be band-obsessed to fool Harriet into thinking he was cheap and band-obsessed. Which I’m sure he’s totally not, guys. Anyone who’s into art and drama and stuff could see that.

I have to dock Tom Batiuk a few points for failing to note which anniversary this is. Tsk, tsk, Mr. Batiuk. He failed to do that yesterday, too! Whatever happened to craftsmanship? Also, why is it that the characters Tom Batiuk clearly likes best are the most loathsome? I find this Harry guy a complete waste of time.

I’m going to give you guys a slight spoiler alert for tomorrow: if there are any local stores that have a good deal on brain bleach, you might want to stock up.

What the Heck Do We Care?

Now you know how many ‘holes it takes to fill Montoni’s Pizzeria.

TheDiva
July 10, 2013 at 11:50 pm
Okay, folks, place your bets:
Halle is drawn in the background of a Sunday spread in a listless nod to continuity: 6/1

Does Halle Dinkle’s presence here qualify as a “crossover” if nobody knows about her comic strip? She’s the one helpfully holding up a placard-sized “Happy Anniversary Mom & Dad” card. There’s another unfamiliar face in the crowd, above Dinkle’s head, whose identity will be revealed Friday (as an afterthought; TB’s just giving a shout-out to one of his music friends). Rachel’s been made to don the dreaded red apron but Wally (and his wonder dog Buddy) have been permitted to mingle with the invited guests. I would give Dead Skunk Head John a hard time for showing up in a t-shirt, but hey: we’re in a pizza parlor.

Get ready for another guest blogger: starting Monday, it’s the snark stylings of Beckoning Chasm!

Funky Say Relax

So stressed is Harry over planning the Surprise Anniversary Party that he’s dramatically clutching his chest as he leaves Montoni’s. Kind of a shame that he and Harriet have no children who might take it upon themselves to arrange a celebration that they both could enjoy…what’s that you say? They have a daughter? You must mean Halle Dinkle! She’s the star of her own comic strip, created by TB for the National Association for Music Education website. A music educator like her celebrated Dad, no doubt Halle’s too busy enjoying having her summer off to plan her parents’ party.

Cake Boss

As stated earlier, I couldn’t get an advance peek at today’s “comic”, and as I write this, there are already thirteen excellent comments (including, of all things, a positive one!) that pretty much cover any point I could’ve made on this pointless installment. I’ll just remind the readers that last week, when Les met Funky at Montoni’s to go jogging, that I suggested that Funky had been kicked out of the house and was living at the pizzeria. Reading today’s strip in that context at least lends a little intrigue.

March Madness

Ah, yes: Montoni’s famous solid gold jukebox. Batiuk’s fond of saying that Montoni’s Pizzeria is a replication of Luigi’s Restaurant in Akron, OH, “right down to the nails in the floor.” But an image found on Flickr shows a rather more mundane ‘box in that real-world establishment. I guess Tom felt that a classic round-top Wurlitzer would add some charm. Sadly though, whoever colors these strips either has never seen a Wurlitzer, or is too lazy or incompetent to color it in any shade but sickly yellow.