Tom Batiuk – Son of Stuck Funky

Tom Batiuk Takes A Bold Stand! About What, I Have No Idea.

Discuss.

UPDATE: As of now (about 12:30 AM Eastern time), I have gleaned two more theories from the comments here and at joshreads.com, and added a sixth one of my own:

“Buy physical books instead of eBooks.” (HAT TIP: Colonel Chrome in the comments). Lillian is as a brick-and-mortar bookstore owner, writer of books that are presumably not in eBook form, and resident of a place where physical book signings are central to the economy and social structure. So this makes total sense as a position she would hold. (I include Y. Knott’s “download only from spinner racks” in this category.)
“Do something more productive than downloading.” This was inspired by a Comics Curmudgeon comment.
“Download from somewhere other than the Internet.” This is a new reading that I noticed. It makes no sense, but that’s never been an obstacle in the Funkyverse.

I can’t edit the poll without losing existing results, so if you want to vote for one of these, use the “something else” poll option above, and also like the appropriate post in the comments.

Please Omit Flowers

I’m really trying, dammit.

I’ve come to realize that my writing style can be… a little harsh. I’ve been making an effort to dial back my vitriol, focus my criticisms less on the creator as a person, and direct them at his work only. I even wrote a genuinely nice anniversary announcement just a couple days ago. But today I saw something that made me realize that the awfulness of the creator and awfulness of his work can never be truly separated.

I don’t usually talk about Tom Batiuk’s e-mail newsletters. They’re a semi-private message, intended for a curated list of fans, not the general public. Because of my J-school background, I feel that airing them in public is a little unethical. But I just can’t let this go uncommented on. Besides, we’ll all see it in the Akron Beacon-Journal soon enough. Here it is:

Just like the Pulitzer Prize-nominated Lisa’s Story, with an even measure of humor, hope and tragedy, tackled breast cancer, raising awareness for and about the leading cause of cancer in women, so I hope the upcoming Jeff’s Story can educate and inform on prostate cancer, the leading form of cancer in men.
Tom Batiuk, April newsletter

Murder In The Burnings: The Minor Suspects

So the burnings have suddenly turned into the world’s lamest Choose Your Own Adventure game. And we all know what the correct answer is in this world:

She’s got two valid reasons to call the police, a threatening mob standing in puddles of their own unburned accelerant, and the world’s greatest arsonist right next to her. But you do you, Lillian. Lord knows you have stellar judgment when it comes to not censoring other peoples’ reading material.

Continue reading “Murder In The Burnings: The Minor Suspects”

Interview With The Vapid

Last week, I wrote about Tom Batiuk’s blog post, where he defended his use of what he calls “non-linear storytelling.” He said that he intentionally abandons stories and returns to them later. I thought this was a nod to the fact that 90-something Eugene wordlessly rowed into a lake a couple weeks ago, and his story abruptly stopped there.

Silly me. It turns out Batiuk wasn’t talking about Eugene. He was actually talking about his favorite subject. No, not comic books. Himself!

I will go through this week of Crankshaft day-by-day, because it deserves that much attention. But first, let’s take a moment to review the history of the Centerview Sentinel.

Everybody Needs A Screed

On April 18 – almost two months ago now – ComicBookHarriet promised you I would deliver a “screed of epic proportions” about the two and a half weeks of book signings that happened from April 17 to May 4. I referenced this promise on April 22 and May 25, but haven’t delivered yet. It’s about time I did. But I’m going to move the goalposts a little.

Continue reading “Everybody Needs A Screed”