HeyItsDave

* yawn… ι(´Д｀)ﾉ

Oh…sorry… it’s just that today’s strip is more of the same “Wabbit season! Duck season!” crap between Tony and Funky and it’s, well… not very interesting.

Poor Wally, though. We can just turn the page or (more likely) click away. But he’s stuck there in Westview, the comics version of Purgatory, standing helplessly by in his gaunt and so weary way as the two Morons in Chief discuss using toys to deliver pizzas.

You know what would be cool? If Funky had secretly fallen off the wagon and suddenly started getting the DTs while looking at that stupid drone:

Tony in the sky, with Pizza

In typical Batom® fashion, today’s strip is nothing but more of yesterday’s scribble – does anyone really need to be told that a “pizza drone” is intended to deliver pizza? Gotta hand it to T-Bats: no one can cram two panels of plot development into four panels so well.

And the more I look at that ridiculous little Guido-headed quad copter, the stupider this idea is. I see the props and landing gear, and a really small box in the middle which probably holds the batteries and control circuitry. Where does the pizza go? Inside that little red box? Maybe Tony’s going to send pizza out one slice at a time.

drone, [v] 3. To proceed monotonously

HeyItsDave here, taking a break from playing Pokemon Go long enough to mock the Westview simpletons.

Today’s strip is ripped directly from the headlines of…what, November 2015, right? That’s when Amazon first announced they were working on drone delivery for a service they’re calling Amazon Prime Air. I guess that really got the ol’ creative juices going for T-Bats…too bad he writes this stuff so far in advance.

I’ve seen those little quad copter “drones” in action, and they haven’t got enough lift to pick up a roll of quarters, let alone transport a gloppy Ahia mess of a pizza. Can’t wait to see how this plays out…although, if the typical Batiuk Tony Montoni arc template is used, it will be several days of just talking Tony out of yet another of his spaghetti-brained ideas.

Burn, baby, burn!

Link to what Bats hath wrought.

Wow. An entire week of Starbuck Jones and every bit of it has been peripheral to the actions of Funky Winkerbean regular cast members. I have to take back all the nasty things I’ve said about the writing in this strip – it’s obvious that Tom Batiuk is a genius – he’s managed to bring about a whole new comic (Starbuck Jones) while keeping the science fiction out and revolving the story entirely around the residents of his beloved Westview Ohio. Truly he is a master of his craft. Though I have to say that it would have been nice if there had been just a teeny bit of Mason Jarr hamming it up, or Marianne Winters’ cute little implied butt. No matter, there are still a few years to go until Bats gets that Lifetime Doodler Award or whatever, so I guess there’s plenty of time to ~~inflict~~ entertain us with the continuing interweaving of Funky Winkerbean and Starbuck Jones.

Oh, yeah, and before I forget – my wish was granted, too!

Mason, please, for the love of all that is holy, have Holly do her her Flaming Baton act.

— Me.

One last thing…we joke about this movie being “straight to cell phone” bad, but c’mon. We all know how bad it’s really going to be.

And…that’s it for my turn in the barrel. Beckoningchasm will be here tomorrow with some more high-quality snark, and I’ll be back in the comment section ruining T-Bat’s artwork.

Get Me Outta Here

Link to today’s strip.

Cool, so the bus driver who knew a shortcut home is lost. And it’s funny because that’s not a cop, it’s an actor! But the driver doesn’t know that! Even though he knew they were shooting a movie in town! ROFL!

You guys have all day to leave comments and tell me why a space opera is taking place in Ohio and how street cops get involved with space battles. Geez.