Crankshaft – Page 12 – Son of Stuck Funky

Hoppy Easter!

This is more brief announcement than a post. The next installment of the Animal Headed John series will go up tomorrow night, as today I was busy hiding old Valentine’s Day candy in little plastic eggs in my house for my housemate to find, and greedily drinking in all the cookie baking compliments I could wring from my family members. We’re talking Les Moore levels of smug every time someone bit into one of these bunny shaped bad boys.

For those of you reading who celebrate the season, I pray your day was joyful. For those of you who don’t I hope you still had an awesome day, too.

All of us, no matter our beliefs, can together enjoy the mad rush of Half-Price Mini Eggs day tomorrow.

Crankshaft celebrates Easter like a California Millennial with a Catholic grandma across the country. About once every 10 years, just for the cameras, to make the old lady shut up. This year was an off year for him. So enjoy these reprints of prior celebrations.

*I feel like this is a decent set up lacking a good punchline. Something like, ‘Too much candy is bad for him.’ ‘What about you?’ ‘The sacrifices we make for children…’*

*Classic Crankshaft as it should be. Part of me thinks the final panel should be silent, but other than that, a solid strip.*

SHUT UP ABOUT YOUR DAMN MOMMY ISSUES JEFF YOU’RE SIXTY FRIKKIN YEARS OLD
(Oh, do NOT remind Tom that Jeff is part Ukrainian. I do not need him to use another war as a soapbox.)

Crank On This

I’ve tried to be patient about this, and I warned everyone back in December that I wasn’t going to allow this to happen to SoSF, but I’m just about at my wit’s end with the incessant “Crankshaft” patter. “Dinkshaft” is brilliant, and the parody strips are great, and I don’t even mind the cow posts either, but the long-winded discussions about Ed, Lillian, Pm, Jff and the rest of that sad-sack sorry lot of unfunny elderly goons has to be dialed back a few notches, at the least. Sorry, but I’m not going to continue to grease the gears behind the scenes to provide the world with a platform to discuss that piece of crap. Now, I don’t want to be overly hostile about it, but this is Son Of Stuck Funky, not Crankshaft Korner. Either stay on topic, or I’ll shut the whole thing down. This is the final warning, folks. You’re either with me, or against me. That is all. For now.

After FUN*K

I haven’t posted since the heat death of the Funkyverse. Special thanks to TFH, everyone who’s contributed, and, of course, CBH, who’s exceeded my already lofty and unrealistic expectations with her special brand of Batiukian madness. I’m mildly surprised and definitely pleased to see SoSF still more or less chugging along. I genuinely had no idea what to do or what would happen, but it’s all just kind of worked itself out. And how many things can you say that about, eh? Thank you, Harriet, and by all means, carry on. I wouldn’t even attempt to try and stop you at this point. You don’t want to fool around with farm people, they have wiles.

Continue reading “After F*U*N*K”

This Week in Westview

Hey gang, TFH here! The title character in a Tom Batiuk comic strip can expect to meet one of only two possible fates. We saw John Darling famously meet his at the wrong end of a gun. Such will not be Ed Crankshaft’s fate. He’ll join Funky Winkerbean as a title character who’s rarely seen in his own strip. Continue reading “This Week in Westview”

DATELINE UPDATE TODATE

Hello all!

Comic Book Harriet here with a posting schedule announcement.

Going forward I’m going to try to have a fresh post up for you guys Mondays and Thursdays. (The posts will go live at our traditional time of 10:30 New Jooisey time the night before.) Other esteemed hosts and guest posters may also crop up any day of the week!

I have several character retrospectives in mind, but am also open to suggestions. Any particular person, place, arc, or theme you’d like to see, comment below.

Current Crankybean grousing will be included, and is welcome in the comments.

Come back tomorrow night for the exciting conclusion of THE FRANKIE SAGA.

In the meantime. Enjoy this bit of obsessive nonsense.