Yeah, what’s the point of doing anything unless you’re going to get an award for it?
Tag: Dinkle
Keeping Score
(Sorry about the preview earlier, folks, WordPress’ scheduling system is as bad as Funky Winkerbean.)
Ahem–as I was saying earlier…
Just so you know, Tom Batiuk, having your characters acknowledge that your jokes are terrible doesn’t make them not-terrible. Are we supposed to identify with the people in the last panel, who are thrown into a panic by these mal mots? No–we’re not. Because these puns aren’t terrible enough to elicit that kind of response. Mostly these stupid, underthought puns would just make people grimace sourly, hoping that they might get a sale, but otherwise waiting until the “punster” moved on to the next booth.
Now, the actual presence of Dinkle would make people scream for mercy before he could even open his mouth. Because he’s damned terrible. Plus, he’s the worst.
So, we look forward to another week of Dinkle defecating witticisms, and telling everyone how awesome he is. What a charming character. Let’s introduce him to Wilbur Weston.
OMEA, Oh My
Oh…great. More “Permanent Hatchet Face” Dinkle dispensing “witticisms” at the OMEA. Strap yourselves in for a week of terrible word-play…wait, that’s no different from any other week.
Strap yourself in for another week of Dinkle being where he has no business being. Seriously, why does he come here every year? He’s not a band director anymore. What he is (other than loathsome) is Tom Batiuk’s most recognizable character (especially in band director circles). And by shoving him to the OMEA meetings, Batiuk is guaranteed a table to hawk his wares.
Nice to see the drummer from the Bedside Manor group there in panel two. Those old coots are really getting around these days, huh?
Making History
Spaceman Spiff jinxed me yesterday! But joke’s on him, I’m not even going to talk about today’s dumb Dinkle strip.
Why?
Well, I and others on this blog have long admired the blog Mary Worth and Me. It has been going strong for 15 years, all helmed by the esteemed blogmeister, Wanders. The undoubted highlight of each year on the blog is the Worthy Awards, which just wrapped up voting. Many have expressed a desire to see a similar event for Funky Winkerbean.
This year, Son of Stuck Funky is proud to announce the first ever Funky Awards!
Votes will be accepted through midnight January 16th. Winners will be announced throughout the following week.
Vote Early! Vote Often! Vote HERE!
Before we present our nominees, I would like to take a moment to thank Wanders. I reached out to him for pointers on how to set these up, and he responded with the kind of humor and advice that would have made Mary herself proud.
I know that I speak for all of us here at Son of Stuck Funky when I extend my heartfelt condolences to the Mary Worth community as they mourn today’s tragic cruise ship death of strip regular Wilbur Weston.
And now onto the nominees!
The Thatsnot Hewmore Award for Standout Unnamed Character
1.) Referential Heckler
2.) Suffering Saint Nursing Assistant
3.) Average Comics Fan
4.) Mature Comic Con Attendee
5.) Zombie Orderly
6.) Oblivious Parade Spectator
***
The Livinia Memorial Award for Achievements in Feminism
1.) Women Be Shopping
2.) Women Be Changing Their Minds
3.) Women Be Jealous
4.) Women Be Catty
5.) Women Be Another Species Entirely
6.) Women Be Tiny and Disappearing in the Background
***
The Backpfeifengesicht Award for Most Punchable Les Moore
1.) Remembering Old Friends (For the First Time in Years)
2.) A Single “Manly” Tear
3.) No True Sports-Fan Fallacy
4.) Self-Centered Stage
5.) Deadly Pundemic
6.) The Smile on My Face
7.) Interacting With Fans
***
Most Puzzling Continuity Questions of 2021
1.) Who Directs the Community Band?
2.) What is Rachel’s Major?
3.) Who Did the Dinkles Have for Thanksgiving?
4.) Are the Reindeer Broken or is Tony Dead?
5.) Was Phil Holt Really a Ghost?
6.) Where Are the Kids? Who Are the Kids?
7.) What Even Is Continuity?
***
Story Arc of the Year
1.) Dinkle Joins the Choir
2.) ‘Lisa’s Story: The Movie’ Wraps and Flops
3.) Phil Holt: Resurrections
4.) The Winkerbeans Rehab, Reno, and Recover
5.) Tom Worships Idols of Silver
***
The Panel of the Year
1.) The Final Note
2.) Rare Flying Discman
3.) Take THAT History!
4.) Smoking Vader
5.) Les Waterboards Himself
6.) Eros Panoptes
7.) Stag Film
8.) Pizza Box Signal
***
The Best Funky Winkerbean Strip 0f 2021
1.) Expensive Equipment
2.) Accessorizing
3.) The Joys of Reading Over 50
4.) Interdisciplinary Thinking
5.) Funkyverse in a Cookieshell
6.) I’ve Seen Things You People Wouldn’t Believe
***
The Worst Funky Winkerbean Strip of 2021
1.) War of the Word Zeppelins
2.) Post Pandemic Doom Posting
3.) ‘Disappointed a Lot of Fans’
4.) Feeling Blue
5.) Randy Old Man
6.) Gross Randy Old Man
7.) Just Gross
Once again, vote HERE! Voting ends January 16th.
Don’t Worry, One of You Will Surely Die Soon
Dinkle’s garage door is like bricks, falling leaves, and Becky’s pinned-up sleeve-they all have to be featured as prominently and as often as possible. “This guy has a treble clef painted on his door, isn’t that wacky?”.
I find it really, really hard to believe anyone from Westview could ever receive that many awards.
This strip is just another example of how Batiuk can’t seem to decide if Dinkle is supposed to be an egotistical maniac or actually great. And I wonder if Dinkle’s name legally includes “World’s Greatest Band Director”, or if that’s the award he won (which you think someone would have mentioned it at some point). I guess all those other band directors were wrong when they referred to themselves that way. If Dinkle calling himself WGBD is supposed to be humorous, you shouldn’t have him literally receiving awards referring to himself that way.
Son of Stuck Funky 
