All that time he spent defusing bombs and dodging death over in Afghanistan didn’t do a whole lot for Cory’s cognitive thinking abilities, as he appears to be considering including Funky in some sort of relay race deal, which is a bit like entering an obese donkey in the Kentucky Derby. I liked old Cory better, at least he wasn’t just another predictable Pollyanna do-gooder with a dumb grin on his face 100% of the time. Now though…ugh. If the guy was any more bland he’d be completely invisible.
Tag: Les
*Puff* The Tragic Fat Man
Poor, poor Funky. A decade of steady exercise and he’s more decrepit than ever. Whiner too. One wonders why he keeps it up given how it produces no results whatsoever, but in the Funkyverse logic is kind of…uh…”fluid” like that. Like for example how no one has viciously murdered Les yet despite having numerous opportunities to do so. Very unrealistic. Just visit New Jersey and start gallivanting around with that smirk and that headband and see how far you get. He’d be severely beaten ten times before he hit the pavement.
Merry Les Mess
Sigh. My most dreaded SoSF hosting scenario…a Les & Funky jogging arc. But wait! Two mysterious strangers approach Les and Funky, asking if they can run with them and…oh. Oh, it’s just Cory (yawn) and Rocky (zzzzz). Given that the new and improved Corporal Cory is about as interesting and entertaining as watching a compost heap molder, I’m not expecting much in the way of long-term plot development here or anything. Har.
Not only does he once again maddeningly start another new arc with like fifty other ones still dangling there, he has the f*cking temerity to put Les in that (sorry, no offense but there’s no other proper way to put it) fruity lavender-ish pink headband of his, which only increases my desire to use some sort of special gun to launch a huge railroad spike through his forehead. Wow is that enraging or what? It’s like he’s taunting me, deliberately looking for ways to annoy me even more, which should not be possible according to all existing scientific models.
#LessLes
So today’s strip remains centered on Les’ comments from the bleachers, and the banality can not be broken by Funky’s lame-ass joke. It got me thinking about how much better FW could be with just a few little tweaks. You know, like making it funny again, or dumping that stupid Starbuck Jones crap, or something really simple like getting rid of Les. I really wish T-Bats used social media; it would be awesome if the #LessLes hashtag went viral and gave him a rage-aneurism.
[Edit: Changed link from nj.com to sfgate.com because of problems loading the strip from nj.com]
I said I DON’T NEED AN EDITOR, DAMMIT.
Country Music Television?
Canine Mammary Tumor?
Congenitally Missing Teeth?
Cervical Motion Tenderness?
Chronic Multiple Tics?
Thanks, Tom, but Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy already has a perfectly good acronym. High five for getting the “C” right, though.
Congratulations to Holly and her Pokemon Go adventure. You can see by the picture she’s caught (left to right) a Jynx, a Weedle, and a Snorlax.
[Edit] As reader Erich noted, someone at Comics Kingdom managed to spot Tom’s goof and take care of it before the strip actually went live. I’m leaving my original post as it stands, though.
Son of Stuck Funky 