Dozebudd

It continues in today’s strip… “it” being history’s longest drive from Florida to Ohio. Or maybe it is a chronicle of the most unbelievably boring competitors to have ever taken part in The Cannonball Run.

I don’t know if this is the best of this week’s miserable set of strips or the worst. One one hand, everyone gets a rare moment of positivity: Holly’s mom is certainly enjoying her reminiscence of Holly’s childhood, Holly seems to be enjoying it as well, and even Funky is spared TB’s wrath for one panel. On the other hand, this strip also rips each and every one of those positive bits away because TB long ago decided that Funky and anyone in his orbit are not allowed to have nice things. Yep, this is the worst… nothing worse than a tease.

Crash Test Mummy

This is the arc that never ends
No, it goes on and on, my friend
Today’s strip… promises an end in only one more day
But they’ve been in Ohio since mid-week so I must say…

This is the arc that never ends
No, it goes on and on, my friend
TB has… concerning issues writing about old parents
They seem to have a death wish, which in Westview makes some sense…

‘Cause this is the arc that never ends
No, it goes on and on my friend
I have… avoided song parody but now am forced to cave
I apologize to Shari Lewis as she rolls in her grave…

This is the arc that never ends
No, it goes on and on, my friend…

With a capital “T” and that rhymes with “P”

Today’s strip will long be remembered as the one where Holly’s mother gives her daughter a wet willy. Also, pools are nice to have or something.

Look, there’s not much to this. I guess I could point out that a trip from Florida to Northern Ohio with three elderly folks would reasonably involve an overnight stay in a motel or some other type of lodging and yet, all three of these characters are wearing the same clothes they have been wearing since the trip began. I could point that out, but I won’t. I don’t want to be a beady-eyed nitpicker.

O-haik-o

“Grandpa’s Waffle Barn”
Said three times in today’s strip
Good haiku first line

Grandpa’s Waffle Barn
A stand in for Waffle House?
At least it’s no pun

Grandpa’s Waffle Barn
Two things grandpas are thought with
Just not together

Waffle Barns closing
Across Ohio, I blame
The politicians

Kucinich, Kasich
Working together to destroy
Our tasty waffles

Did Holly’s mom leave
Ohio in ’92?
Fall apart it did

Bathroom joke again?
Or is Mrs. Budd hungry
10 minutes later?

Route Canal

Dinkle appears in today’s strip.
No “spoiler alert” tag… this is not a spoiler, it is a warning. You have been warned. Read at your own risk. Or don’t, your life will be better off.

You know what, I’m going to focus on just one small little part of this strip and let our great commenters take the rest of it apart. I’m going to deal only with the first four words that appear in the strip, “Speaking of band candy”.

“SPEAKING OF BAND CANDY”?!
NO ONE was speaking of band candy! No one other than Dinkle is ever speaking of band candy! No one in their right mind wants to speak of band candy! I suppose Dinkle is correct in “saying “speaking of band candy” because that is a 100% accurate description of what he proceeds to do… thus, he most assuredly wanders around uttering “speaking of band candy” whenever he wants to speak of band candy. There is no other possible explanation. I’m typing “speaking of band candy” over and over again in desperate hope that this will be last time those words are ever written. Please. Please.