First and foremost! Happy Mother’s Day to all the Moms, Grandmas, Aunts, and Female Mentors in our comments section. I hope that somebody spoiled each and every one of you today in the way you love best, whether that be your favorite food, a foot massage, a long Sunday nap, or an obnoxiously obsessive post about a defunct comic strip.
Whatever you did today, pretty good chance it was better than Rose Murdoch’s Mother’s Day back in in 2014.
DCH John Howard is charged with heinous comics crimes! CBH is on the case! I am highly qualified to provide legal commentary and counsel on this fictional court room drama. Below, a list of my qualifications.
1.) My friend is a lawyer.
2.) I have a working internet connection, and am not afraid of the CIA seeing my search history.
3.) My mom has 60% of the OJ Simpson Trial recorded on VHS.
4.) I once got two speeding tickets in one week.
So I am READY. I am KNOWLEDGEABLE.
Let me flash some of that sweet sweet knowledge!
Continue reading “Tribulations and Trials”John Howard has been arrested for ANIME CRIMES!!!
As Y. Knott, Duck of Death, and our other Crankshaft correspondents have informed us, Lillian is currently at the Ohioana Book Festival, which is going on for realsies this weekend. I briefly had considered going, (seriously,) just for a wacky vacation road trip with a wacky destination. I’ve already forced my housemate, partner-in-crime, and heterosexual life partner, to promise that someday we’ll do a fun Funky tour. But we couldn’t go this year due to the very following crucial factors:
1.) Cows.
Still, probably would have been a low-key fun time. Especially since I’m pretty easy to please.
Continue reading “Book It!”I just know that when I’m on my deathbed, I’ll be lamenting that portion of my lifetime that I spent contemplating Funky Winkerbean.
TF Hackett, April 12, 2023.
