Tag: Cody and Owen

Gallup and Doper

Just look at today’s strip. Kids these days… I tell ya.

With their chullos and their scarves and their short haircuts and their closed circuit television broadcasts and their disagreeable opinion polls and their polka dot boxer shorts that they expose to the world because they refuse to properly tighten their belts because they are all disrespectful punk hoodlums who will destroy America after we retire.

Those ungrateful seniors want to chose where they go on a trip meant to celebrate their impending graduation. How dare they?
Not that Owen, Cody, and company have earned much sympathy from us over their decade at Westview High School, but given that they endure Les and Kablichnick on a daily basis, they are definitely the lesser of two evils here. I politely applaud their efforts to stick it to the administration via sarcastic opinion poll.

Status: Woe

Link To Today’s Strip

Har har har, these goth chicks today, amirite? You know, with all the rings and so on. Because in Westview, when you commit to something it’s for LIFE, damn it!

But seriously, it’s a real shame that there isn’t anyone to gently inform BanMan that maybe it’s time to just stop with the high school-centric premises, as this was definitely one of the most stupid and listless WHS arcs he’s ever done, which is really saying something. What’s next, a week’s worth of gags about fire drills? Water fountains? The way the floor gets slippery when the custodians mop it? If FW gets any more mundane it’ll just feature the characters standing there yawning day after day. And truth be told, it’d most likely be a huge step up.

Antisocial Insecurity

Link To Today’s Strip

In Westview, Social Security gets YOU! As if he’ll ever live long enough to collect THAT! Seriously though, I’ve always seen Owen’s Westviewian future as being sort of bright. He’s fluent in comic books and pizza, he wears the same clothes every day, he’s annoying, in other words he’ll fit in at Montoni’s or The Korner absolutely seamlessly. And someone at one of those businesses will die off or write a movie sooner or later, it’s inevitable. Now all he has to do is, you know, actually graduate.

Driving A Wedge Between Us

Link To Today’s Strip

I thought Wedgeman was a feared “senior bully” years ago. Now he’s in the same class as Stupid and Stupider? More proof that the Great Pulitzer Nominee doesn’t even care if anyone’s still paying attention. Like, for example, Wedgeman’s two entirely different noses today. Seriously man, come on. Someone go over to Batom Inc. HQ and poke him with a stick to see if he’s still conscious.

I’m just happy to see that TB is finally making school bullying funny again, like how it was back in The Olden Days when everything was way better. Owen’s been asking for it, you see? Kind of like when Lisa was shamelessly sauntering about senior beer-bashes with her red Solo cup like some sort of strumpet. In the Funkyverse you bring your fate upon yourself and even if you don’t it doesn’t matter as The Universe will strike you down sooner or later anyway. It’s all so clear to me now.

Craigslist

Link to today’s strip.

I honestly don’t know anything about “senior class trips” so I don’t know if Craig’s question has a legitimate basis (“Can a senior still go if he’s in danger of flunking?”) or if this is just more “Today’s Kids–the Marching Morons” that this strip loves to toss onto today’s world.

A better question might be something like, “If you’re so gifted, Mr. Moore, why are all your students still idiots?”

As ever, the students are all clueless while the staff are cynical saints, weary of the impossible task of imparting knowledge.  Does anyone remember Funky Winkerbean back in the Act I days–wasn’t it the reverse?  The staff were all cynical tight-asses, dedicated to stopping fun, while the students were happy free spirits?  Has Mr. Batiuk’s dim view of high school aged along with him, so that the heroes have shifted sides?

It’s something to ponder, from a strip that offers pretty much nothing to ponder, other than “Why is this still happening?”