The Westview Pizza-ccord

This guy still doesn’t look anything like Bill Clinton, but at least he’s game to help the gang in today’s strip, which means we’re probably closer to the end of this idiocy (and the start of a new idiocy). A President Clinton junk food joke? Really, TB? Did you write this in 1994 or when people stopped laughing at the thought of the President eating French fries (which was 1995, I believe)?

34 thoughts on “The Westview Pizza-ccord”

  1. Would anyone under 30-35 years old even get this gag? Who is this even for? Sometimes the joke is that Montoni’s food isn’t very good, then sometimes the food is incredible, so which one is it? WHAT AM I TO BELIEVE HERE???

  2. Missing Funky’s request and a background, even the creators are desperate for this story to be over.

  3. Just when I think it couldn’t get anymore insane, Bathak manages to surprise me. Please tell me this ends with Rachel going into the bathroom to open the shower and have Wally say it’s just a dream.

  4. The plan is obvious. Bill’s going to play “Glow Worm” on his sax and Adeela will be free. Genius. Pulitzer.

    1. Sanctimonious, tasteless, and full of tacky product placement. How much of this arc has been about pizza? And it’s not even a real brand of pizza! Did Luigi’s Restaurant hire Batiuk to draw another placemat in exchange for mentions in Funky Winkerbean, like that stupid pizza box monster story? Or is this another one of Batiuk’s closed-minded opinions, where Montoni’s pizza is the only correct kind of pizza? In addition to all that, this story trivializes a serious social problem, and uses a real person as an unpaid, unwilling endorser of Batiuk’s ultra-narrow opinions.

    2. I’m really starting to regret all the times I bashed him about those dumbassed geeky comic book worship storylines and all those excuses for Les to exhume Lisa’s corpse and make us all watch as he copulated with it… Because he evidently took my criticisms to heart.

  5. Somehow the most unrealistic thing about this strip is that involves a New York resident requesting Montoni’s pizza.

  6. Okay, so, as I was saying earlier…But WHERE are the delivery car and the insulated bag!?

  7. Since the only person with recent Administration experience is the former Secretary of State, I’m guessing that Bill will outsource the job to Hillary (although the time jump would still make this 2030).

    The admittedly insane Butter Brinkel/Zanzibar The Murder Chimp arc made more sense than this.

    1. Okay, time to delurk for a minute…the insane and too-short Robots And Space Queen miniarc made more sense than this. I’d be happy to believe everything that’s happened since we last saw the rescue robots has been a smoke-induced hallucination. Especially this week’s idiocy.

      The robots, of course, are real.

  8. He is not supposed to eat Pizza because Bill and Hillary are strict vegans now. Chelsea turned them vegan some years back

      1. And they probably use fake cheese anyways, not real mozzarella.

        Vegans cannot eat dairy.

  9. Haiku of the Day:

    See what I can do!
    Oops, turns out I can’t do squat.
    Where’s my pizza bribe?

  10. Peanuts had an obscure character named Loretta. She would show up in various places and say only one thing: “would you like to buy some girl scout cookies?” This story arc is like that. Every third panel says “Would you like to buy some Montoni’s pizza?”

  11. Even if this was written a year ago, there is no reason to believe that the current administration would do anything at the request of any Clinton. Zero, nada, nothing! Again reality is not a player in TB’s Westview.

  12. “Bill, you’re supposed to lay off the pizza. And I won in 2016, I won I tell ya. It was the Russians … believe me, the Ruskies I say.” All this as Bill calls the guys in the white coats to haul his crazed wife away. Hey, that’s as logical as this plot!

    1. Batty might very well vividly remember a slice of pizza he ate twenty-seven (or thirty-seven) years ago, but I’d wager that generally speaking the Clintons probably get out a little more than he does.

    2. Like so much in Funky Winkerbean, it’s a problem of tone. Batiuk wants us to take this story with total seriousness, but he portrays the Clintons like a bad radio morning show skit in 1993 would. Oh look, Bill likes junk food and Hillary is a harridan who won’t let him have any fun. Yuk yuk.

  13. But they won’t be able to send pizza, because ICE has impounded the delivery car and insulated bag!

    1. Did they? I wish we knew what really happened because it would be much more interesting than this story.

  14. Tomorrow’s one-panel strip: the Clintons are sharing an airborne ICE detention cage with Adeela, with a label on the cage that reads “Priority Ship to Afghanistan: One Way.” “Well, Hil,” says Bill, “I guess I don’t have as much influence now as I thought I did!” “You HAD to get involved in exchange for free pizza from Ohio, didn’t you?,” says Hillary. For some reason, Adeela has a half-smirk on her face.

    1. All this anguish and hand wringing for Adeela? They should all pay as much attention to their own children or parents !

  15. “And you thought Les the Waiter in the Dead Lisa movie was the dumbest cameo ever?” Batiuk smirks. “You can hand my beer back to me now!”

    1. It’s funny because Bill thinks Westview women actually have non-procreative sexual intercourse

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