Tag Archives: pizza delivery

The Westview Pizza-ccord

This guy still doesn’t look anything like Bill Clinton, but at least he’s game to help the gang in today’s strip, which means we’re probably closer to the end of this idiocy (and the start of a new idiocy). A President Clinton junk food joke? Really, TB? Did you write this in 1994 or when people stopped laughing at the thought of the President eating French fries (which was 1995, I believe)?

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Dude, where’s my car?!

After spending more than a month on this insipid story arc and these irritating characters, today’s strip offers some much welcome relief… I’m speaking, of course, of the Green Pitcher, far and away the best character in Act III Funky Winkerbean (and probably Acts I and II as well, to be frank). By the way… hello there, I’m billytheskink and I’m… uh, I guess I’m going to talk about the Winkerbeans as they talk about Adeela.

FASCINATING! (In my best Merv Griffin voice)

More interesting than Funky’s understandable concern for his restaurant’s assets or the icy glares of his family members is his continuing transformation into Gasoline Alley mainstay Slim in both attitude and appearance. Less interesting, of course, is Wally’s inability to use his phone to tell Funky that Adeela’s arrest had to do with her (mistaken) immigration status.

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Like A Shit Brickhouse

Link To Sunday’s

The thing finally happened, on a Sunday no less, which of course means it’ll happen again tomorrow. Perhaps they could deport Adeela to a city in dire need of architects, as the idea that this self-made immigrant is somehow supporting herself by being fifth in command at a failing local pizzeria gets dumber every time I ponder it, which is rarely.

I think the arc should just end right here. Adeela just disappears and is never heard from or mentioned by name again. Then in a few years Wally could do something stupid and quote her out of context with that annoying snide-yet-dunderheaded look on his dumb face.

“My old Muslim friend whose name escapes me always used to say that mozzarella is the saffron of the common folk.”

“Wow, your Muslim friend must have really been quite a character!”

“She was, Rachel, she was!”

I mean who would even care? Maybe forty people in the world even know who the hell Adeela is and if you were to poll those forty people and ask them they would unanimously not give a shit. She’d be like the Russian in “The Sopranos” or Becky’s mom, an enduring mystery for die-hard fans (chortle) to forever ponder.

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I’ll Adeela In

Link To Today’s Strip

It’s Return Of Son Of Son Of Garbage Week as 2019 finally almost draws to a merciful close. In today’s dreary installment, Adeela takes a pizza order from one of those sub-cretinous comic book imbeciles up the stairs in that fetid reeking “store” of theirs and wonders why architects with degrees from the local community college don’t seem to be in high demand right now. She’s in the Westview pizza mafia now and you know their oath…”sauce in, sauce out”. It’s really easy to GET a job at Montoni’s, leaving that job is another matter entirely. Historically speaking, 90% of the time you end up on the can or in Bedside Manor, but the perks (free pizza, financial leverage over the local comic book concern) can’t be beat.

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Confirmation Pie-as

Link To Today’s (zzzzzzzz)

Like I often say, this Pulitzer (nominee) Boy guy really, REALLY needs to get out more. While it’s nice to see Rachel the green pitcher again, this is a weak, weak gag, even by FW standards. I mean sure, it’s the second weekend of January 2018 and the 2019 strips are finished and ready to go into the prepaid CK envelope but he’s still a few strips short and has to come up with something fast or the whole weekend will be ruined so he throws together a few slapdash strips on the fly. I get that, but still, at least pretending to try would be the polite and decent thing to do for the readers, CK and himself…or so you’d think if you knew nothing about FW and the guy who writes it. But alas, I do. Every minute spent on FW is another minute he can’t spend at that pizza place, the post office signing books or looking out the window and as Lisa showed us, life is short.

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