Tag: Holly

Spagettaboutit!

Link to today’s strip

Apologies for the late post. I decided to wait for the Sunday strip to drop, rather than blather on about something from earlier this week.

The last thing Funky needs is nutritional value. Given the weight he’s able to hold onto despite working out with a personal trainer, he must have the metabolism of a hibernating turtle.

Funky also seems to be suffering from a serious case of IMS. Irritable Male Syndrome. Spilling food on yourself often, as well as other issues with fine motor control, are probably a sign of some kind of tragic illness. Money on Parkinson’s.

Funky doesn’t take vitamins? They were paranoid enough about his health to take a trip to see a specialist together a couple years ago, but he doesn’t take a basic multivitamin? Way to go out on a limb for a non-joke.

Some really crisp linework in the strip today. No weird lobster hands, lots of detail, and weirdly dramatic shading. I mean, look at the detail out the window. And just an almost loving rendering of pasta noodles…mmmm….

Too bad the marinara looks like blood. Funky, you got red on you.

Good advice that you just didn’t take

Montoni’s is busy in today’s strip! What? And Holly is flustered to the max and jealous of unhealthily self-conscious Cindy all the sudden*? Crazy!

Speaking of Crazy, his advice… isn’t ironic? I don’t know, actually, but I do know it’s been relevant to TB for decades. If only TB would take it one day.

Wait, Montoni’s is busy with regular FW cast members. Sheesh, this strip doesn’t even truly earn its “the rare Montoni’s customer” tag. This, THIS level of business has Holly frazzled and exhausted? She is as cut out for food service as Funky is for giving out marriage advice.

* Holly being self-conscious about her body hasn’t happened in a while, but to be fair, it actually isn’t new. It even goes back to when she was the other shoe.

Thanks for putting up with me and my blue tongue for the past two weeks. Thoughts and prayers for our next blogger…

Lions And Funky And Holly…Oh My

Link To Today’s Panel

One wonders why they’d go through the trouble of moving what appears to be a huge stone lawn ornament all the way to Ohio from Florida, but then again expecting this to suddenly start making sense now is just plain foolish. The stone lion sure is oddly specific, though. I assume it has to have some tenuous connection to BatHack’s “real” life, so to speak. Hopefully he just keeps that info to himself.

Coming tomorrow: Melinda’s in-ground swimming pool arrives, followed by the water on Sunday. It’ll be an Atomik Komix cover, of course…”Oceania”, the superhero who can move entire huge bodies of water by himself. The reality bubble will feature Funky and Melinda standing next to a large tanker truck as she complains about Ohio’s “hard water” as Funky looks on stupidly.

In The Garage

Link To Today’s Strip

“Cars”? You might be able to squeeze ONE Batiukmobile in that garage, but plural? No f*cking way. I can’t tell if that’s supposed to be sepia-toned Cory or Funky or what, nor can I tell how it relates in any way to the premise here, or why this wasn’t just a one-paneler, but at least it’s already Thursday which means this is hopefully almost over.

That’s a pretty decent house by Westviewian standards, definitely a home befitting the local pizza kingpin. Nice size, nice lawn, nice garage…it’s certainly better than Moore Manor, with its dead trees and weird detached office. Chester’s place is nicer, but than again he IS a renowned comic book collector and all. I’ve always wanted Batiuk to do a map of Westview and the surrounding area so I can see where everything is in relation to everything else, as this fascinates me to no end. Given his obvious refusal to put anything more than significantly less than the bare minimum into this thing, I assume I’ll be waiting for that for some time.

Storage Snores

Link To Today’s Thing

A sad listless joke, built on sad tired tropes, at the expense of a sad beaten man. This is one of those stealthily depressing FW strips, one that appears harmless enough on the surface but which reveals all kinds of terrible truths about the strip in general. Most “writers” probably would have skipped over this part of the story and jumped ahead to the part where Melinda is all moved in already, but not BatYak. He obviously saw some moving trucks outside and had another “and I thought it’d be very, very funny if…” moment and yadda yadda yadda here we are, with six days of watching Funky watching people putting boxes into a truck. Sigh.