Chester M’Boy

hitorque
February 21, 2020 at 2:13 pm
…I FINALLY FIGURED IT OUT!! Chester the Molester is supposed to be Bruce Wayne, but instead of fighting crime through an alter ego, his mission is to right all of the wrongs of the comics industry while saving the entire genre for posterity singlehanded…

Well that would make at least as much sense as whatever has gone on around here this week! Bought off his conscience? Chester’s really not guilty of anything, aside from being a rich nerd. Unless the guilt he feels is over having built his entire fortune on all those comics he stole from the drugstore as a kid. In which case it’s going to take more than selling off one rare comic–which he owns in triplicate–to truly fix his karma.

Pant the Load Right On Me

I right away had to look up “pantload;” not as a prerequisite for moving it to the Batiuktionary, but because I understood it to be a pejorative. It’s what you might call someone who’s clueless and unpleasant: “Chester’s a real pantload.” Indeed, over at urbandictionary you can find some pretty colorful definitions. More um, sophisticated reference sources, however, support Ruby’s usage: a nicer way to say a “metric shit ton” of a given thing.

Bye Bye Miss American Buy

Sensing that Ruby isn’t going to be an easy lay after all, Chester resorts to a combination of flattery and bribery. Ruby’s mistrust of the Chiseler is on display again. For him to attempt to ravish her or shake her down for money would be more plausible than him (awkwardly) handing over the Miss American cover art for which he’d paid big bucks.

Give It Away, Give It Away, Give It Away Now

Maybe Chester recently learned he’s only got a few weeks to live? Why else would the one they called “the Chiseler suddenly acting so generous? If we’re talking about this particular cover, by “rights” it belongs to neither of them: Ruby admitted to having smuggled it out of her old place of work. I guess posession is nine tenths of the law.

Forward Into The Past

Well, this is one crowded cover: the Atomik Komix Krossover that nobody asked for. We see our heroines and a dog fleeing on a motorized trike from a giant mechanized Nazi. The art’s not bad, but the muddy, muted colors and the Photoshop lighting effects don’t exactly make it pop.Like the first Miss American cover we saw back in September, this is not the work of a female artist; it’s by Thom Zahler, another Ohioan (maybe Ohio is a “thriving hotbed of Golden Age comic book activity” after all).