In which the actress who nearly threw herself off the top of the Hollywood sign—over nothing— advises Les about managing the madness.
Tag: Les
Honest Stories of Working People as Told by Rich Hollywood Stars
More of Batty’s trademark exposition repetition in today’s strip. Monday’s and Tuesday’s panels showed these two driving up to a building clearly marked Hollywoodland Studios. Today Les reminds us verbally, and anyone whose interest is piqued (doubtful) enough to zoom in on that little shingle under the LISA’S STORY sign will see the studio name yet again. Ponderous, man, @#$% ponderous. Anyway, panel 2 is the first time we’ve seen a happy expression on Les since back in April when he and Cindy reminisced about their chaste New Years Eve.
Don’t You Know Who I Am?
I know that among our loyal readership, there are a number of you who have some working familiarity with the entertainment business. Help me out here: I’ve heard of a “closed set,” but…the lot is closed? The parking lot? “They’re shooting Lisa’s Story today.” Shooting? Already? I wasn’t aware that casting, or any other aspect of this production, was even finalized. And here comes the star of this movie they’re shooting, and he can’t get on the lot because the security guard does not know who he is. Is he wearing those shades because he’s blind? And Mason, to his credit I guess, instead of throwing a movie star shit fit, sits there pouting like a douche.
C’mon, Marianne
I haven’t even looked at today’s strip, dear snarkers. I’m sitting outside by the firepit with my family. Catch up with ya later!
Later…
Balancing humor with sensitivity to tell stories we need to hear…Some of the stories can be told over a cup of coffee, while others require a full-on Roman feast.
Amazon blurb for The Complete Funky Winkerbean, Volume 9, 1996-1998
Shit. We’re back in “Hollywoodland.” Why is Mason so hellbent on casting Marianne Winters as Lisa Moore? For that matter, why is making this movie so important to him? What’s behind his strategy to get Les on board with casting Marianne by inviting other actresses to read for her role? It’s not enough for Tom Batiuk to reprise and rehash the whole Les Goes to Hollywood thing, but this time Les is even pissier and all Mason does is fly him back and forth to the coast, take him to lunch at the Chateau Marmot, and kowtow to his every whine. Stop lathering Les’ ass for God’s sake, Jarre!
Bored In Least L.A.
There’s just something about the mid-central Ohio area. The third-rate pizzerias, the comic book mills, the torrential downpours and never-ending blizzards, the incompetent medical care, porch swings and gazebos, the apathetic students and faculty, the death and amputations…Les looks at all of this and sees home. One again BatHam demonstrates his eternal enmity toward Hollywood, as he’s never going to let that failed “Crankshaft” project go. Everything there is awful, impractical and fake and the people are all vapid materialistic phonies, unlike the bottomless well of saintly pious martyrs who call Westview home. He’s just never, ever going to get over being rejected, the guy carries a grudge like it’s herpes or something.
Thanks for all the wry banter over the last two weeks, gang! Stay tuned for El Presidente himself, TFHackett!
Son of Stuck Funky 