Epicus Doomus
March 1, 2019 at 12:01 am
Four words: Les Moore must die.
You win this round, Les Moore. You came, you saw, you walked out of the store with the very first thing you tried on. And you happily paid full price. Now, just for good measure, toss out one of your endless supply of quotable quotations. There’s that look of disgust again from Cayla, who clearly has at last had enough of your bullshit. Not to worry: your true soulmate, Linda Bushka, will be back on the market soon!
See, this is what happens when you half-ass it.
Tom Batiuk had this hilarious joke about how only old people use the post office, but he lost that joke somewhere on his desk, so we got this one instead:
Because it might have been “okay” if the length of time was a week, or a month, but if it was a year? Man, the laughs just don’t stop. Mainly because they never start.
The problem seeps in when we look at what he wrote on the 31st of July.
So, the “always like” seems to imply that he’s done this more than once. But the “this year” above seems to imply that he only does it once a year or so.
Which means that Jessica is still in Los Angeles, while Dullard has been in Cleveland for a year.
Or, what I think is more likely, Jessica has jettisoned his sorry ass and is living a successful life elsewhere, and Dullard just likes to “pretend” he has a relationship.
Either way, it makes Dullard look bad, so thumbs up from me!
PS: Speaking of artwork, it almost looks like Commissioner Gordon from the Tim Burton Batman movies checking his watch, and is that Chuck Ayers himself in the beard?
Ah, the perils of drawing your comic strip, word balloons and all, a year before you write the dialogue. I feel certain Tom Batiuk wanted to have some reference to “medication” in Dullard’s word balloon, but alas he couldn’t make the word fit. Too bad, as it would clarify the mysterious “they” in Ann’s balloon (supposed to be “medications” I guess) and make her reference to a “booster shot” tie it all up neatly. It still wouldn’t be funny or good, but one could point to it as (at least) well constructed.
Oh well, can’t stop now! Onward, ever onward, toward that 50th!
I try to point out things I like whenever I can, and I like the shadow pattern of the window on the far wall. Somebody took his time applying craftsmanship to make that, and it is appreciated. And unless I’m mistaken, the picture on the wall looks a little like “Christina’s World” by Andrew Wyeth. It may not be, but I like to think someone tried to slip something of quality into this dreary waste.
Another perpendicular panel and more of Pete and Mindy meeting cute. I can’t tell you “the age of that joke” (I’m guessing ancient) but I can tell you Batiuk last used it six months ago (in another sideways strip no less). I guess he forgot, just like he forgot that it was a Tweet, not a “coded Junior Spaceman message” that Jff sent to the director. Pete nurses a glass of coyote urine as he watches Mindy gorge on pizza and Italian bread. He’s either too cheap/broke to get a slice for himself, or perhaps he’s already grooming svelte Mindy to join the ranks of dumpy blonde Westview wives.
It is comics like today’s strip that remind me how good I have it. I’m not taking high school English from Les Moore. I never had to take high school English from Les Moore. It is as if he is intentionally trying to be the opposite of the teacher that successful people so often cite as the inspiration that got them to make something of their life. What a miserable experience in every single way this strip is.
Les’ senior students did poorly on their quiz last Monday and now his freshman students have done poorly on theirs… I see a common denominator here. I bet these students would too if Westview High had a math teacher.
Son of Stuck Funky 
