Some Mil-Dew And Some Mil-Don’t

Link To Today’s Strip

Blech, what an unsightly mess this is, even by fictional Sunday comic book cover standards. A mildew gag…really? Yikes. And “Wild And Watery Pulp Fiction”??? Really? Sounds like someone’s comic books might have gotten a little soggy in the not-too-distant past, as this is sort of weirdly specific in a discomforting kind of way. A superhero who’s susceptible to mildew…truly the hero the Funkyverse needs.

Maybe the next Atomik Komix (I will NEVER not hate typing that) title could be “The Horrible Hack” and, like with mildew and newsprint, his natural enemy would be online comic strip snark blogs. “Ha ha ha, you’ll NEVER escape the deadly grip of my continuity ray, Horrible Hack! BAH ha ha ha!”.

Stayed tuned for Comic Book Harriet, who’s throwing herself on the grenade tomorrow!

Crossover Parma

Well, at least the math is correct in today’s strip. Atomik Komix does indeed have only four titles (The Inedible Pulp, Rip Tide: Scuba Cop, Atomic Ape, and The Girl Scorch), all of which TB has lovingly rendered in big splashy Sunday strips… via guest artists.

What doesn’t add up is this need for more than four titles to do a crossover. TB does it with three comic strips, one of which hasn’t been printed in nearly 30 years. Even a non-crossover strip like this one has crossover elements – Pete is the child of John Darling character Reed Roberts. I suppose none of this is “Mega-Mind-Blowing-Everything-Will-Change”, but nothing that Pete and Durwood could come up with would be either.

Twenty-Four-get This Dreck

Oh hello Mr. Stock Male Nerd Cartoon #27 from 10,000 Clip Art Images ’98 CD-ROM (OS/2 Edition), glad you could make it to today’s strip. If you hadn’t shown up, Pete and Durwood might have had to twiddle their thumbs, and we all know how much they hate slacking off…

Y’know what’s really nerdy? Math! Let’s do some math. Lessee, it’s early May, so we’ll say Atomik Komix most recent issues were published in April. Here’s their titles that we know of and when we first see them “published”.

The Inedible PulpMay 2018
Rip Tide: Scuba CopJuly 2018
Atomic ApeSeptember 2018
The ScorchJanuary 2019

Assuming one issue per month for each title, there would be 33 issues. Assuming a once every two months schedule there would be 17 issues.

The Inedible Pulp – 12 issues/6 issues
Rip Tide: Scuba Cop – 10 issues/5 issues
Atomic Ape – 8 issues/4 issues
The Scorch – 3 issues/2 issues

No math involving this strip or story arc equals entertainment.

Smirky Smirkybean

It is only at today’s strip where I finally realize the true meaning of Free Comic Book Day. I get it now. It’s not a day where free comic books are given out. No, it’s a rallying cry. A desperate plea. Comic Book Day must be freed from the clutches of these unbearable shmucks! Free Comic Book Day! And Free Holtron while we’re at it!

Also, Logan Church is here now. Such a sad turn for the once-accomplished business blogger. You could drive a semi-truck through her earrings.

Graphic Drivel

I know what you’re thinking, “How can today’s strip be any worse than this past week?”

Well, newsflash!

raph-itsworse

Les. The most dreaded name in the newspaper. The name that even alone evokes the most dire of thoughts. “Les” is the sound that a rattlesnake makes before it dies in a brush fire. It’s the Florida State Police code word for a sinkhole. It was the name of Francisco Franco’s pet canary. It is far and away the worst part of the title of Les Miserables.

I don’t know what possessed this poor poor child to wander near Les’ table, but I do know that if he winds up reading Lisa’s Story he is not going put it down disappointed that only one person dies. No, he’s just going to think that the wrong person dies. And he would, of course, be right.