Link To Today’s Thing
At least demented, Alzheimer’s-ridden old Morty had a unique FW personality all his own, uninteresting and un-entertaining as it may have been. Now, alas, he’s just like the rest of them. Sigh.
Note to Tom: “Grandpa Google” is never, ever going to catch on, mainly because it doesn’t make any f*cking sense whatsoever. Perhaps it’s almost time to stop carrying on as if The Internet is some sort of newfangled marvel and just allow the characters to use it without acting all incredulous about it.
Coming tomorrow: Mort’s three-hundred pound box of old catalogs arrives and is unfortunately dropped on Ed’s oxygen hose. It crimps and he dies. Entire generations of comic strip readers shrug and/or say “what the hell is a “Crankshaft”?
Having been informed in today’s strip that the name of his newfound comic book company is already trademarked, Chester decides to employ the strategy of phonetic misspelling that made the TurboGrafx-16 the number one name in video games.
I find this strip to be fairly discordant because of the use of “Grandpa Google” combined with the revelation that an Atomic Comics already once existed. First, “Grandpa Google”… please stop trying to either make this a thing people say or pretend that it already is a thing people say. It is not and it never will be. However, stupid as it is, I can allow that it is some kind of in-universe slang. But that brings in the second point of discord. If this is a fictional universe in which people say “Grandpa Google” without being blackmailed then why does “Atomic Comics” have to be an unusable trademark? Skirting a real-life trademark is a spectacularly uninteresting story arc, not to mention that “Atomik Komix” isn’t likely to stave off a lawsuit that “Atomic Comics” would invite anyways. This makes the set up of The Phantom Menace look like Macbeth.
Today’s strip has been upended, leaving only a narrow width within which to frame Pete and his pretty prey. Was Googling Pete part of Mindy’s premier prep duties? In particular, researching his arrest record? Though his record is likely clean, ’round here we all know Pete’s shady history, including changing his surname as well as his proclivity for flrting with high school girls.
My less-than-encyclopedic knowledge of the “Crankiverse,” and the decade-wide time gap existing between Centerview and Westville, make it impossible to discern Cind—dammit!—Mindy’s true age, but we’ll slot her in that same vague twentythirtysomthing range along with Pete, Darin, and Jess. One thing these two both have in common: they both refer to the famous search engine as “Grandpa Google“, making them two of the only three people on earth to refer to Google in this manner.
It speaks to the drawn out pacing of this comic strip that today’s strip could seamlessly follow last week’s, completely doing away with Cindy’s fire escape escapade. I’m not an avid Mary Worth reader but I imagine the same thing must happen over there a lot.
A cursory search of Grandpa Google for the phrase “grandpa google” reveals that nobody except Pete and Tom Batiuk actually call Google that, so into the Batiuktionary it goes. A good gag would have had cranky old Cliff reply to Pete “Who are you callin’ Grandpa?” But clearly this is one internet savvy old man. He’s used the web to move enough SJ collectibles to create a trail that has led these strangers hundreds of miles to find him. What little inventory he has left fits in an old suitcase: a raygun, rocketship, some action figures (and were “action figures” even a thing back in the days of serials? Boys didn’t play with dolls until G.I. Joe), along with a rather intriguing “coloring book” whose cover will probably serve as next Sunday’s entire strip.
Hey gang, TFH popping in…today’s strip wasn’t available for preview, but it’s probably about Mr. Sponge’s clone and it probably sucks. I just wanted to give the readers a heads up that April 9th marks the fifth anniversary of Son of Stuck Funky. Stay tuned for some kind of fun contest announcement to win a very mediocre prize! Thanks for reading and stay Funky!