WHS – Page 2 – Son of Stuck Funky

Font Of Outrage

This, right here, is why everyone hates getting a Dinkle arc. Dinkle and/or band directing just grinds this already glacially-paced strip to a dead, still halt. As astoundingly bad as last week was, you had Makeover Summer gawking around, Boy Lisa being in the wedding for some reason, a possible love triangle, technology gags, comic books AND pizza. But this week? Total Dinkle flatline. I’m not even sure what the gag here is supposed to be. I really hate it when he shamelessly panders to band directors like this.

Fortune Dweller

Uh… Cayla, had you met your husband before today’s strip?! Good feeling… ha! You’d get a “ha ha” if that was genuinely funny.

THIS, by the way, is why Les is (rightfully) not allowed to speak at graduations…

^{Where were you when Lisa was recording, Marge’s significant other?}

^{Note: Barry Balderman didn’t leave WHS because he was bullied or ignored, he left because he was obsessed with being valedictorian and had a nervous breakdown after he overheard Principal Fred Fairgood say that Cindy had the highest GPA in the class. What he did not overhear was that Fred was making a dumb joke that GPA stood for “Greatest Popularity of All”. Les earned those boos and then some.}

Lest you think that WHS might make the mistake of letting Les speak at graduation again because everyone who was in the administration when he was a student is retired… They aren’t.

I’m half certain that (then vice-) principal Nate has committed to work at the high school until he (or Les) dies in order to make sure that Les never steps in front of a graduation ceremony microphone ever again.

Dick and Mortar

Our own newagepalimpsest called it yesterday… but we can’t be assigning blame for the reappearance of him. For one thing, we all know TB works a year in advance (note the reference to a graduation ceremony from “two years ago” in today’s strip). For another, reading this strip always carries a risk of appearances by him or Dinkle, regardless of the context.

I know we were all hoping he was not out loathing people on a book tour or a Hollywood something… but nope, he‘s loathing people here at the graduation ceremony. At least he‘s observing rather than participating (as the faculty often do), so I guess it could be worse.

0-2-1-3-4

Today’s strip is all about the numbers for me… and not just the zip code of “Boston, Mass”. We’ve got 3 faculty on stage here, which is what… half of WHS’ known paid staff these days (along with Les, Cayla, and Lefty)? Of course, maybe you only need 4 teachers, 2 administrators, and a Dinkle when you only have 16 students in your senior class. To be fair, only nerds would show up for a school assembly during the last weeks of their senior year, so maybe these are just all the nerds (that would explain why Maris Rogers is having to plan on crashing graduation parties instead of hosting them).

Wait a second, this is the Senior Honors assembly. That explains it…

^{With credit and apologies to the Scotts, Smith and Hepting.}

Operation Over-bored

Did you know Linda teaches history at Westview HS? No? Well, then you you’ll learn something from today’s strip. It is, apparently, more than any of Linda’s students can say they’ve learned in several years now.

Yeah, well, she was supposed to be retired by now and she’s only in it for the pension anyways… Plus, the last time I think we saw her actually teach anything she was teaching the “Family Living Course” back when we were still meeting the Owen&Cody generation of kids.