Tag Archives: gags that go on way too long

Eye Do Not Care Anymore

Is Funky telling the truth in today’s strip? Last time we saw him get a physical was in early 2017, when he and Holly flew to Dallas (sure…) to visit a so-called “superclinic” (sure… again) for physicals. Well, Holly claimed it was an annual physical back then, so maybe the Winkerbeans’ annual January Dallas superclinic physical trip just recently happened. Not sure when that would have been, we’ve seen Funky and/or Holly every single week so far this month…

Oh wait, none of that matters. Nurse Scrunchie doesn’t care about Funky’s physical health, she just needs to know if he can afford to pay for his cataract surgery. What a scathing and original commentary on the American healthcare system! Groundbreaking stuff!

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Eye vey iz mir!

Oh, so we’re back to the jokez! in today’s strip. If we’ve learned anything in the last week and a half, it is that Dr. Droopy and Funky both are willing to dish out this cornpone but neither is willing to take it (in fact, I would argue that this is quite literally the only thing we have learned in the last week and a half).

Well, as they say, “write what you know”… Certainly no one can claim that TB doesn’t know hypocrisy.

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App-alling

Ugh. You just know Batiuk indulged in an epic smirk after writing this one. Especially distasteful is how it carries on the long tradition of someone pointing that a joke is supposed to be funny. And you actually have someone physically pointing at the joke.
In unrelated news, Becky’s head has fallen off and been reattached at a terrible angle.

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Dead/Missing Children=Comedy Gold

“Hahaha, people dying or missing is hilarious!”-Tom Batiuk, who brought you Lisa’s Story, Bull’s Story, Susan’s Attempted Story, Jacques Stropp’s Off-Camera Story, Wally’s Simulated Video Game Story, and Wally’s MIA Story, all of which were Very, Very Serious and must not be mocked because just because they’re called the funny pages doesn’t mean they have to be funny.
In “Adding Hedge Funds to Your Joke Attempt Adds Nothing, Vol. 2” we have “Varies by district”, which adds nothing. Apart from “haha, educators come from different districts, that’s the gritty realism we’ve come to expect from this quarter inch from reality strip”.

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Is This Strip For Anyone?

Hey, a sign, and people standing around watching it. That’s sure a good use of comic’s sequential storytelling capabilities-people standing around looking at an inanimate object. I wonder how long before this entire strip is just white text on a black background.
Also, is there anything remotely funny in the sign itself, apart from “haha, people make a lot of money off band candy sales” (which seems to contradict the fact that bands and music departments are always hard up for money)? Yes, haha, hedge funds are an investment option, but pointing that out isn’t close to funny.
Here’s a much better investment option. Get a job where literally nobody pays attention to the quality of your work and milk it as long as you possibly can. Batiuk could definitely give lectures on that.

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