Tag Archives: hatchet face

Shrinky Dinks

Link to today’s strip.

As February dawns, the first strip of the month is not available for preview, but let’s be honest–Batiuk’s not going to cut away to something different, not when he’s got Dinkle to shove in people’s faces.   Those seemingly endless weeks where he craps out those terrible, terrible Claude Barlow witlessisms should be proof of that.

Yesterday, he wailed and moaned that he couldn’t find free food.  What could it be today?  Perhaps…his ass, with both hands?

I wonder if Beck will get any lines…so far, she’s only spoken on Sunday, and it was, of course, nothing but praise for Dinkle.  So, she’s really already played her part.  All that’s left is a praise reprise.

(GAH, sorry folks, that was almost Batiukian…surprising how easily one slips back into this stuff…)

 

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It’s not what you thINK

The power is out again at Atomik Komix in today’s strip?! Oh no! That means we have to read a comic about the power being out again

There is a lot in this strip, and it will make your head hurt if you actually think about any of it. So please don’t, that is the burden I have chosen to bear this week.
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Is Atomik Comix in such dire financial straights that Chester didn’t pay the electric bill? Was it because he couldn’t part with any more of his gardening catalog collection?

If the electricity in the old Batom Comics building is so unreliable that it goes out weekly…
– Why doesn’t Chester move his 3 employees to a few hundred square feet of space in one of Cleveland’s many affordable, functional, and maintained office buildings?
– Why is there no generator or other back-up plan to maintain power?
– How does this building pass city inspection? Even Cleveland has standards.

Why doesn’t Mindy know what to do? Not one week ago, she met a deadline while working from a coffee shop.

How does Mindy not know what Dr. Martin’s is? Yeah, I get that the average person doesn’t know what it is (which really weakens the Dr. Martins=Doc Martens joke) but she is paid for her apparent artistic talent and she’s never used physical ink or been into an art supply store?

Does Chester really think that ink he found in a box of unused supplies from Batom Comics is still usable for professional-quality work? For reference Batom Comics shut down in 1972.

How does Durwood’s face manage to get even longer?
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There, I’ve though about all of that for you. I have determined that there are no satisfactory answers and that this whole story arc is asinine, so don’t even think you need to worry about it. Carry on and have a nice Saturday.

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Thor’s Day, January 10

Today’s strip was not available for preview.

Isn’t that just like the comics industry? We finally have a story arc about a woman righting the egregious wrongs of the comic industry’s man-o-centric male-ocracy and then it stops being available for preview. Typical good ol’ boys club behavior, really…

Well, while we wait for the strip/truth bombs to drop, let’s take a look at the start of Mindy’s comics education, which began with the discovery of Lucy McKenzie’s comic book collection in the attic of the McKenzie home back in 2007… mere minutes after she smirked at a confused Lucy while visiting her at an Alzheimer’s home. That is really what happened.

cs4-5-2007

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Editor? I barely know her!

Mindy continues to play editor in today’s strip. Just think, had she been employed at Atomik Komix from the very beginning then we Chester might not have had to endure the launch title flop that was The Inedible Pulp.

How does Mindy know that Armorilla is not so named because her super power is skin that is as tough as armor? Oh right, because she knows as well as we do that TB, Pete, and Durwood are not creative enough to come up with something like that. Frankly, “Armorilla” sounds more like she should be a clothed gorilla adversary of Atomic Ape and Charger Chimp (ugh) than a presumably human villainess who fights someone called The Scorch. One might think that wearing lots of armor would be easily exploited by a superhero called The Scorch, who surely has heat-oriented powers. None of these characters = “one”.

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All Bucked Up

Link To Today’s Strip

Yes Tom. The Scapegoats used to be abysmal, Dinkle used to be zany and Holly used to explode a lot. Hearing the now-elderly characters reminiscing about Act I sure brings back memories, memories I’ve already forgotten. Buck, who most likely doesn’t have another friend in the world, suddenly decides to start razzing a clearly insulted Bull all for the sake of perpetuating Bull’s endless karmic comeuppance. Simply hilarious. I certainly hope this isn’t leading toward an entire week of “boy our team sure did used to suck” gags but sadly it appears to be inevitable now.

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Auld Lang Wry

Link To Today’s Strip

Mother-in-laws….amirite? I mean come on. What’s a fella to do? One dame at home is plenty and I already have a dog to fetch my pipe, slippers and tumbler of scotch, thank you very much. What an old bag and so forth. And now the Copa is proud to introduce…Mr. Henny Youngman!

So another three hundred and sixty-five FW strips are in the bag. It sure looks like a lot when you spell it out like that. I mean you can say the same thing about any Act III year but man, 2018 was a real shit pile, even by FW standards. Exactly four things happened in FW in 2018.

Pete and Boy Lisa left Hollywood and began working for a whimsical Ohio-based komix book company. Mindy later joined them. They presumably still work there.

Wally, who may or may not be over the worst of his PTSD, invited his apparently estranged daughter Rana to Thanksgiving dinner. She accepted.

Bull’s rushing record was broken.

Funky’s mother-in-law visited Westview for a band competition and may remain there until she dies.

Pete and Boy Lisa’s unholy alliance with Chester was by far the dominant story arc of 2018 but even so, after all that time and all that toil he’s still only at the “they work there now” part of the story, which is exactly where it’ll resume and exactly where it’ll end next time as well. And what did we learn about our old pal Wally during his nearly two month long forced march of an arc? Well, apparently he’s “almost” about to graduate and he “seems” to be “doing better”, which is hardly news. He did invite his apparently estranged and seldom-seen daughter to dinner, though, which is where the story left off. Yup, that’s some real compelling character development right there.

Pervert Mort made a late run there at the end but the RRRRRRRR thing in the Wally arc was probably the single dumbest FW moment of the year in my opinion. 2018’s SoSF Most Reviled Player award (the “Les Moore Award”) goes to Les Moore, obviously, although the overall lack of Les was 2018’s sole bright spot. Pete and Boy Lisa are co-runners-up, though. It’s easy to forget now but that AK idiocy went on for freaking months.

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The Way Things RRRRRRRRRRR

Big ups to billytheskink for enduring the last two weeks of this “significant” arc. As Billy pointed out yesterday…

…Professor Forehead never assigned partners, he just told students to pair up themselves. He is not going to be able to assign these two new partners without breaking groups up, and if he is like most of my college professors, he is not going to care much about this melodrama.

Seriously, you’d think two adults–Wally must be pushing 40, right?–could put aside “the differences between us” and just suck it up and finish whatever nebulous assignment they’ve been paired up for and move on. Nope. But at least something is…well, not happening but starting to happen. The unlikely study partners are startled by a row of red R’s that are presumably a sound effect. An air raid siren? A snarling tiger? Roy Orbison?

(Programming note: Tuesday’s strip won’t appear until midnight eastern, so expect the dreaded placeholder post…same deal Thursday as we begin a new month)

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